Someday

Once there was an elderly professor and one evening he was taking his usual walk. He was enjoying the crisp night air and the wind blowing gently. But suddenly he heard a voice crying out, "Help me! Help me!" The man looked around and saw no one and so he continued his walk. Again he heard a tiny voice, "Help me, help me!" This time he looked down and he saw a small frog. He gently lifted up the frog and looked at it intently. The frog spoke, "I am really a very beautiful princess. If you will kiss me, I will turn back into a princess and I will hug you and kiss you and love you forever." The man thought for a moment, placed the frog in his top pocket, and continued walking. The little frog looked up out of the pocket and asked, "Why don’t you kiss me?" Our wise professor responded: "Frankly, at this stage of my life, I’d rather have a talking frog."

To transform ourselves from what we are to what we choose takes more than kissing a frog. In my ministry of healing and teaching, my main goal is to help people transform their lives. From fractured memories to peace filled souls is a tall order. However, I don’t believe it is a fantasy to be able to transform our lives and our world into a peaceful, joyful spaces. Any change on a personal level is challenging because so much energy is spent on things that don’t really matter very much. We make a big deal out of what cell phone or cable provider to buy than we do addressing what it is about ourselves that matters most.

Some things people desire to change include weight, work, relationships and financial situations. But how much time do we spend each week with our creative spirit giving energy to these important aspects of our lives? I believe we sabotage transformations that would create more joy and peace in our lives. We scan the net, spend money on QBC, watch mindless reality shows, drink, talk on the cell while driving, text message to strangers or simply stay extremely busy doing everything that has nothing to do with our dreams. What’s sad is that if we stay busy long enough we don’t have time to dream anymore. The only place our dreams linger is deep down inside us. When they peek out we just set them aside for "someday."

If you want to be healthier it is important to be aware of what would make us so. Our nutrition habits, our lack of spiritual exercise, our work and relationships are indicators of how healthy we are. When any of these areas is not contributing to our well being, I suggest a "Sabbatical " to reflect and choose differently. We might call this our "mental health break."

No one but the individual can change their own life. We think others control our destiny because of the choices we have made in the past. Every day we have the opportunity to choose differently, Trust in God means to surrender your busyness and live your dream so that your "someday" becomes now.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that the miracle of Your love for each of us will not go unnoticed. Let us stop worrying about what we don’t have and focus on being grateful for all the wonderful people You have brought into our life. May your mental health plans be filled with "someday" dreams that bring your heart and soul God’s rest and peace.

You Are Living Water

Today I would like you to develop a mental picture of water gushing from a rock. Last summer, I hiked the Green Mountains in Vermont and searched to find Warren waterfall. I followed the stream through the woods and then climbed some cliffs and climbed farther, until I came to a rock, and there it was. A waterfall gushing full forced out of the rock. Do you have the image? Can you see it, water gushing out of a rock? The water flowed out of the rock, silently, peacefully, flowing from beneath the moss and it was simply stunning.

Once Moses was out in the wilderness and struck a rock and water came gushing out of it. The Feast of the Tabernacles remembered that event. One day, Jesus was watching the priest bend down and dip the water that was bubbling out of the rock, that living, cold, fresh water. Jesus said: "When the Holy Spirit comes and lives in you, out of your heart shall flow rivers of living water."

And immediately, my mind flashes. I see the water coming out of the rock at Warren waterfall. I can still feel the icy water on my barefoot as I climbed from one riverbank to the other to get a better shot of the waterfall. Again I hear Jesus’ words and understand: "Out of the mountain shall flow rivers of living water."

What is this living water? The living water is the Spirit of God, the love of God, God’s compassion and tenderness and mercy and kindness and gentleness for all people. It is the love of God that is flowing out of you. Out of your mouth. Out of your lips. Out of your hands. Out of your eyes. The living, love of God, flowing out from you.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are like little rivulets running through their family and community. They are the cooks who bring meals to students and shut-ins, They are the hands who change the bed of the sick. They are the chauffeur who lifts the wheelchair into the trunk and brings a neighbor to church. They are the volunteer at the hospital, nursing home and hospice care. The spouse who cares for their beloved fallen by a stroke or Alzheimer’s. All these people riverbanks are green, plush green, verdant green, living green, loving green. When the Holy Spirit lives in you, out of your heart shall flow rivers of living water.

Let Them Speak To You

As a young seminarian, Memorial Day memories turn to my dad, a veteran of WW II and commander of his American Legion Post. At the local cemetery, we would honor our war heros by offering prayers, laying the wreath, sounding taps and a twenty-one gun salute. The words of John said it best: "No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends." I have heard this verse so many times that the ultimate sacrifice is to give one’s life for friend or country. But I wonder if that was the message Jesus was talking about. He wasn’t talking about war, was he?

My dad was invited to speak on this day and he would always turn to me and say "Can you write me a few words." So my Sonshines, my stories began long before I took my first homiletic course in seminary. While we came to remember the sacrifice of so many young people, when and how you die isn’t as important as how you live. Surely Jesus didn’t want us to die in wars. When he called his disciples to lay down their lives, maybe he meant something more like to put aside our own goals, our own desires, our own ambitions and to live for others -- to dedicate our lives to our brothers and sisters, our friends, our church, to dedicate our lives to God -- to lay down our own will and to seek God’s will, and then do it.

After the ceremony, dad and I stayed after everyone else left. We moved from stone to stone, looking at each name, each date. As we walked, we came upon a platform carved out of stone. In the center was a sort of a pulpit also carved from stone. I stood behind the pulpit and looked out over hundreds of graves. It was like a congregation of the dead. It was the quietest, most attentive congregation I had ever seen before. For a minute, I imagine myself like Ezekiel preaching to the dry bones. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I shook my head. What’s the matter, dad said. I realized I didn't have anything to say to them. As I thought about their sacrifices, and the sorrow of their families and friends, I didn’t have a word to say. Just then, an older legionnaire friend of my dad had come up beside us. This old WW I veteran looked at us and said, It’s alright that you have nothing to say to them, he said, gesturing to the silent gravestones stretching as far as the eye can see. The question is, were you quiet enough to let them speak to you?

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who cry over the stones of their war heros. In our souls, let us hear:" I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask him in my name. I am giving you these commands so that you may love one another." On Memorial Day, I remember writing my dad’s speech calling those in their graves real heros. I’m sure they never saw themselves that way. There are many kinds of heroes-- a soldier who holds fast under fire because one believes their country needs them; a mother who day after day cooks and cleans and puts her children to bed with a prayer; a farmer who year after year fights to keep his head above water and yet never fails to help a migrant in need. I believe our soldiers did leave us something that will last...let them speak to you. May we honor them, and all those who have served others, by serving the one who chose us and doing His will each day.

Medicine of the Person

Two hikers were walking along the trail, when a Bear suddenly met them on their path. One of them climbed up quickly into a tree and concealed himself in the branches. The other, seeing that he would be attacked, fell flat on the ground, and when the Bear came up and felt him with his snout, and smelt him all over, he held his breath, and feigned the appearance of death as much as he could. The bear soon left him, for it is said a bear will not touch a dead body. When the bear left, the other hiker descended from the tree, and jocularly inquired of his friend what it was the bear had whispered in his ear. His friend replied: "You need to pick better friends."

In my counseling practice, referrals are categorized according to illnesses: workplace stress, depression, alcohol abuse. The insurance companies want a diagnostic code 300.01 or 305.0 and know little of the person. However, when I ask someone: "What’s it like?" They share their innermost longings, their deepest pain and joy. Patients often comment about the green ferns and plants and enjoy a wall of floral photos. I find it’s easier to help a person like a good friend then a number. It’s extremely important to get to know the whole person if you are intending to treat them emotionally. I call this the Medicine of the Person.

Like a good soup, there are several ingredients about a friend which makes them special to us. Let’s begin with a bunch of trust. We share our innermost feelings, thoughts, ambitions, doubts and disappointments with them, things about ourselves which we would not share with just anyone. We trust that special someone before we "let it all hang out". Next comes a dash of faithfulness. Friends are there for us through thick and thin, in good times and the bad, when everyone else has deserted us. Then, comes a pinch of integrity. A friend is someone who will give us a sounding board, who will challenge our ideas and make them more real. With abandoned we add a heaping dose of forgiveness. A friend is someone who will forgive us if we hurt them with an unkind word or deed. They will not bear a grudge. Don’t forget to sprinkle with lots of joy. Our best times are spent with friends who accept us for who we are, and not someone we have to pretend to be. We can "let our hair down" with them, and drop our usual self-defenses, because we know that they will not hurt us. Did you ever have the experience that even after long separations, friends can meet again and it's as if they'd never been apart? That’s the best feeling. Sometimes, we have to take sometime out. We have to be willing to make sacrifices for one another. We give them our time in listening to their problems. And sometimes we even give up our lives for them. How true this is especially on this Memorial Day weekend when we honor those who laid down their lives for their country. Friendship means not counting the cost.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that they may know that in spite of all our business and turmoil, You love us always and forever. You trust us, forgive us, made us equal, been faithful to us, sacrificed Your life for us and given us joy. But most of all, You loves us unconditionally. May the love of God reign in your hearts always.

Lord, Let Your Face Shine On Us

Yesterday, baby Seth lungs were at full capacity as he was being baptized. During the readings, the homily, the pouring of water, Seth let everyone in church know that he was the center of attention. During the blessing prayers for parents, Seth started once again into a long wail. It was my turn to offer a blessing to the community so I decided to take a different tact. Instead of hollering over his protests, I took the microphone and softly whispered the blessing to the community. Seth stopped to listen and wondered what happened to all the loud noises.

The stories of Easter are about a God who is active in the "everyday-ness of our lives. As mom holds her newborn, as a dad gently cuddles his baby boy. You see, I believe Jesus still walks with us, not as a figure from the past but in the present. Jesus is with us, at our side.

Let me tell you about Justin who has trouble falling asleep at night. Its was not about final exams or a chronic disease, but a genuine concern about what happens to a person when we die. He suffers panic attacks in the middle of the night worrying about what comes next. I told him the story about Thomas who had his share of panic and doubts after the death of Jesus. Thomas did not take his faith for granted nor did he want to appear stupid. He grieved the death of his best friend, and to imagine that Jesus appeared when he just happened to be out shopping was nonsense or a cruel joke. However, you know the rest of the story.

Now imagine Jesus like the Good Shepard, who is restless and disheartened when even one of His lambs are missing or in doubt. I told Justin to imagine himself as a lamb that had wandered far away from this Shepherd for many years. Now close your eyes gently and see Jesus coaxing you to His side. "Come over here...come over here Justin." Imagine yourself nestled against Jesus as He carries you back to a safe enclosure.

Jesus is with us, at our side when we’re sad and troubled, for the Stranger is there. When we’re in an arid place, the Gardner is there. When we’re hungry for love and trust, the Cook is there. When we’re fearful and doubtful, hiding behind closed doors or wide awake late at night, the Surprise Guest is there. When we’ve strayed and sinned, the Shepherd is there. When we feel locked out of life and love, the Gatekeeper is there to let us in to both. When we feel betrayed, rejected and hurt, the Healer is at our side. Like sheep in a flock, we gravitate to the One whose voice we recognize because we know that everyday he comes to us for one reason only: to open the gate so that we might have life and have it more abundantly.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are worried and afraid. Now imagine yourself resting under the tree nestled next to the daffodils and praying Psalm 2:9: "As soon as I lie down, I fall peacefully asleep, for you alone O Lord, bring security to my dwelling."

I Think It Is Time For Me To Take A Break

In one of my favorite movies, "Return To Me" there is a scene when the waiter comes to serve a young female artist. It is evening and she has not painted a stroke on her canvas. The waiter notes her distress, pulls up a chair and says to her "I think it is time for me to take my break." Our young artist finds it difficult to paint because she has a scar on her breast. Her scar is from a heart transplant surgery that saved her life. Ironically, the man she now loves still mourns the death of his wife who died in a tragic auto accident. The donated heart saved our young lady, but she feels overwhelmed by the fact that she carries this man’s wife’s heart. "Life is complicated" says our waiter, and "it takes time to heal the scars of life."

We are all scarred by life in one way or another, whether it be physically or perhaps emotionally. No one goes through life unscathed. Others can hurt us even inadvertently, like our young artist who carries the scar that saved her life. Sometimes the scars may be intentional. But with the scars comes understanding. When something has wounded us, only then can we understand how others who are so wounded can also feel. We can also understand the power of sacrifice, the love which it takes to save the life of another.

In the movie, grandpa reminds his grand-daughter that God gives us the strength to bear the scars of life. It is said that "that which does not kill us makes us our character stronger." It is never easy to suffer, but if we persevere through our suffering, then we will be all the stronger for it. We will also be able to empathize with those who suffer similar ailments. Whether it be the loss of a child from war, or the loss of a limb from diabetes or the loss of hair from radiation treatments, only someone who has endured it can fully understand it. Only those who have been victims of prejudice can understand it no matter how much others may try to "feel their pain". And with that sympathy comes a love which no one can take away.

Jesus "feels our pain" in a way that only another human being could. He became one like us and he suffered for us more than we will ever know. And through this suffering, he became our wounded healer. Just as we would with anyone else, all we have to do is to take our suffering, our grief, our pain and give them to Him. God will not take away our scars, but it will help us to know that He understands.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who continue to suffer from the scars of a broken heart, a broken relationship, a broken promise, a broken life from prejudice, disease or addiction. I like that waiter in the movie who stopped what he was doing, pulled up a chair and told the broken heart: "I think it is time for me to take a break." At this moment, simply pull up an empty chair and let the scars of your life pour out so that the Lord may wait on your soul and heal your wounds.

You Are My Sunshine

The NICU pediatric specialist tells the parents. There is very little hope. Be prepared for the worst. The mother and her husband contact a funeral director about a burial plot. They had fixed up a special room in their home for the new baby; now they plan a funeral. Their three year Michael keeps begging his parents to let him see his sister. Before the delivery, this little one would sing to his sister in Mommy’s tummy. He would sing the only song he knew. "You are my sunshine." He sing it day after day, night after night. Now he pleads to sing it to her again.

Week two in intensive care: it looks as if a funeral will come before the week is over. Michael keeps nagging his parents about singing to his sister, but children are not allowed in the NICU. Finally, this mother makes up her mind. She will take Michael to the hospital whether they like it or not, figuring that if he doesn’t see his sister now, he may never see her alive. So she dresses Michael in an oversized scrub suit and marches him over to the NICU. He look like E.T. but the unit secretary spots him as a child and scolds the mother: "Get your kid out of here." The mother instinct rises to the surface and even tempered mom glares steely into that secretary’s face, her lips are firm. He is NOT leaving until he sings to his sister! Mom tows Michael to his sister’s unit. An understanding nurse assigned to his little sister finds a stool and helps Michael gaze into the incubator and he begins to sing. In the purhearted voice of a three-year-old, Michael sings: "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray..."

Instantly, the baby girl responds. Her pulse rate on the monitor becomes calm and steady. Keep on singing, Michael! "You never know dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away." The baby’s ragged, strained breathing becomes smooth as a kitten’s purr. Keep on singing, Michael. "The other night dear, as I lay sleeping, I dreamt I held you in my arms..." Michael’s little sister relaxes as rest–healing rest–seems to sweep over her. Keep on singing Michael, tears comes streaming down the nurse. Mother glows. "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine... Please don’t take my sunshine away."

Funeral plans were scrapped. The next day –the very next day–the little girl is well enough to go home!

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who struggle with the trust it takes to believe You can take these fragile bodies and make them well again. Restore our memories, and as we gaze upon the "strips of linen" and "burial cloth" help us remember Your words: "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me." I will not leave you orphans, I will come to you." Believe that Love is stronger than death. If a little boy can sing "You are my sunshine," why can’t God say: Take away the stone? See how He loves you.

Save Us Lord

It was on a Palm Sunday, when a young college student heard the homily and the the hymns which seemed for him to miss the point. After the service, he told the pastor that his homily and the hymn, sound as if you think that 'Hosanna' means 'Hallelujah'. It doesn't. Hallelujah means 'Praise the Lord.' Hosanna means 'Save us'. With this new focus, you might better ask yourself this question: What do you want Jesus to save you from?

Seriously think about this question for a moment. It might depend on what stage in life you find yourself. For some might answer, save me from a nursing home, or chronic pain or worse dementia in which I will not be able to recognize my kids. If you are just starting out with a family, you might scream out to Jesus to save me from another downsizing, or exhaustion, or fear of losing my health insurance or worse losing my child to an accident or some miserable disease. As a young college student, you might pray to Jesus to save you from your next exam or project, or save you from youy family that has so much pain in its history or save you from your addiction to alcohol and prescription drugs that keeps you up all night. From patients, I will hear their emotional pain will cry out to be saved from their overwhelming caseloads, depression, separation, discrimination, alcoholism and gambling.
Imagine Jesus walking into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday and the people are desperately crying out to be saved from their fears of terrorism from the Roman guard, discrimination against women and children and disease which has no cure.

Pray and reflect on Psalm 27: "The Lord is my light and salvation whom should I fear? The Lord is my life’s refuge; of whom should I be afraid?"

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who walk with you this Holy Week to learn that You are the ONE with the Words of everlasting life. It is a life that knew loneliness and suffering. It is a life that comes to bring us the strength and courage to carry on in this life for we are NEVER alone. Wait for Lord with courage, be stouthearted and wait for the Lord.

God's Smile

Imagine this morning, you walk out your back porch with your coffee and you sit to watch the birds. This is "sacred time" before you run into the office. As one Sonshine Friend wrote: "It is an opportunity to get in closer touch with God and his creatures in the beauty of the universe He created." Now in the paradise in your head, imagine a soft light, "alpine glow" that sweetly greets you with" God’s Smile." Let me remind you what’s behind that smile, a God who is very kind, a forgiving God who wants only the best from all of us. A God who asks us to love Him with our whole heart and soul and put our complete trust in Him. A God who never wants us to doubt that He lives within each breath we take, with each heartbeat. Simply, place your hand over your heart and feel this tenderness. He has forgiven us so many times for so many things. Sometimes we think our prayers go unanswered, but God has placed a seed of hope and not despair in our hearts so that the alternative usually turns out to help us nurture and grow even stronger in His grace. When we recognize "God’s Smile" we might humbly ask ourselves what have we done to have such a loving God look after us.

I am glad that God does not answer all my prayers the way we pray. Some where and many years ago, a young college student prayed to God that he would make the cut as he auditioned to sing with the Harvard Glee Club. Unfortunately, he was not accepted to their choir. Later after he graduated, Professor Randall Thomson was accepted to serve on the faculty at Harvard University and composed the hymn "Alleluia" that most likely has been sung by every church choir throughout the United States. Believe it or not God smiles when He sometimes says no and Randall was most grateful that God had not answered his prayer that he prayed as a young student. You see it was not his voice but his heart and eyes as he composed his Alleluia hymn that God wanted to give to the world.

Paul put it this way: (Romans 8:26) "We do not know what we ought to pray for..." It is so important to always add, "Not my will, but yours be done, Lord" to our prayers. So, the bottom line is to pray, yes pray without ceasing, and to know that God will answer your prayer. It will be either with a "yes", a "no" or a "wait".

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that with all the difficulties and disappointments and the prayers that are seemingly not answered, You may encouraged each one of them that You are there with them.

I Come To Do Your Will

Often we tend to list the life story of a loved one when singing their praises. However, Sister Jean Marie offered something most profound when she reflected on her mother's life at the Memorial Mass. Before her mom was accepted into the Independent Living Senior Home, she had lost most of her hearing. It was at that moment that her mother said: Yes! In the beginning, her mom made new friends at the home and would visit their rooms. Over time, she needed the aid of a walker and it was another moment for her mom to say: Yes! Then this mother was having difficulty with her memory, another moment for her to say: Yes! Then towards the end of her days, she could no longer speak and again she said: Yes! On the morning of her last day on earth, this mother lay silently in her bed breathing ever so softly. Jean Marie whispered "Mom" and she heard her mother respond with a sigh. Now this daughter realized it was her turn to say: Yes! She fell silent to let her mother know that it was time to let go and bathe in the light of the resurrection, In her deafness, her limited mobility, her lost memory, her failed words, her motherhood, her widowhood, her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren this mother clung to her Lord with faith and courage and found great happiness and joy.

This mother taught the importance of releasing ourselves from the many "things" that clutter our lives. Her "Yes" is an invitation to ask ourselves how much I really need. How many jackets, sport shirts, dresses, shoes? How much jewelry? How much sporting equipment? How much electronic equipment? How much of so many things we have in our lives? This is not "should I get rid of what I don't need?" This is different, more faith-filled and takes us into giving up "good" stuff. We do this because we sense that we are not free in some areas that are tremendously important for us, important for our salvation, and growing in freedom before the things of our lives can be a great grace. This freedom, too, will place us in greater solidarity with those who find such great happiness and joy in trusting in God, while having so much less than we imagine we could survive on.

Pray and reflect on the words of the Blessed Mother: " I am the maid servant of the Lord. Let it be done to me as you say." As parent or spouse, brother or sister, colleague or friend we are called upon daily to say YES when we prefer to say NO. Our YES comes in many ordinary ways: picking up a sick child from school, driving a friend to the emergency room, delivering a meal to someone with a broken wrist, helping a neighbor with a leaking faucet, writing a "letter of reference" for someone who feels neglected or cleaning out the closets and taking the extra clothes to the community clothing center.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who prefer not to be bothered with your messengers who ask us to stop what we are doing and say Yes to your invitation to serve. Give us the grace and spirit to live by these words: "Here I am , Lord; I come to do your will."

Singing Your Praises

Imagine your surprise getting two letters from friends, not your typical one line emails, that praised your support and encouragement when they fell upon hard times. A Sonshine Friend shared that her close friend suffered a serious car accident on New Year’s Day. A shattered hip required replacement and long-term care from all the injuries. Our Sonshine called and prayed and listened and now she got her surprise. What’s better than a flower arrangement or fruit basket, in her own words-- a "letter of reference" that lovingly remembered her time and presence that helped her friend to heal.

For a moment this morning, imagine yourself waiting before the pearly gates and God asks you the question. "Do you have any letters of reference?" We might be embarrassed or surprised by this question. It’s a simple request for proof on how well we carried out His will in this life. Perhaps, there’s a file under your name and God simply pulls out some "letters of reference" that tells the story on how well you listened to your neighbor and brought some poor soul hope and courage.

Now we spend a lot of time during Lent accounting our failures and weaknesses before the throne of God and ask for pardon which goes without saying. But I like to suggest a new Lenten practice. Why not write those people in your life who helped you in your worse moments a "letter of reference." Please no cryptic email messages but a letter from your heart. It expresses your gratitude when you felt abandoned, afraid or alone and this friend took you to a concert or drove you to an appointment. Or, you suffered an accident--fell off your horse-- and you drove your friend to the emergency room and prayed the X-ray was negative. Or, the pilot light went out in your furnace at two in the morning and your neighbor came to fix that 40 year old boiler and brought the heat back on. Or, you were out of work due to another downsizing and your neighbor brought your family food and handed out your resume to their employer to help you find work. Or, while you were providing support to your parent in hospice, your sister was watching and feeding your kids and the kitties.

Now God would carefully review each "letter of reference" to see how well you listened to the needs of the poor, those who had no voice or those who fell off their horse or those who had no job and you came to their rescue. Can you imagine Our Lord’s smile when He looks straight in your eyes and says "thanks for being there for ME."

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that you get them cracking to write those "letters of reference" to their teachers, their neighbors, their siblings, their in-laws, their best friends who always listened and found the time to encourage and support. May your file be full to the brim!

Old Irish "Luchorpan"

Once upon a time in County Donegal, each Sunday morning, Kathryn would get ready for church. Her mom lined up all twelve of her children and then, one by one, wash each child’s face and comb each one’s hair. Each child would wait patiently in line for his or her turn and then go out and play while the mother finished the rest.

One Sunday Kathryn was second in line and anxious to get her turn over with because it would mean nearly a half hour of play time while the others were being washed and combed. Then, just before her turn, her mother noticed that the youngest sister was missing a shoelace and asked Kathryn to go to the bedroom and get one. Not wanting to miss her place in the line and given that her mother did not ask her a second time, she did not go. Her mother said nothing as she combed her hair. When she finished she went out to play.

After playing for ten minutes, however, she felt guilty and went back into the house to get the shoelace for her baby sister. When she entered the mother had just removed her own shoelace and was bent down, putting it into her baby’s sister’s shoe. Felling doubly guilty, she went into her parents’ bedroom and got a shoelace and, as her mother was combing her baby’s sister’s hair, she bent down and put the shoelace into her mother’s shoe. While she was doing this, her mother said nothing but gently stroked her hair.

When Kathryn finished telling the story, somebody asked her what it meant and, rather embarrassed, she said: I don’t know...but it has just stayed with me all these years! A day later, her friend had noticed a button missing from her coat. She realized that she had forgotten to bring any sewing material. Out of nowhere, Kathryn appeared. Are you missing anything? She asked. I forgot to bring thread and a needle. She answered. Immediately, she produced a button, thread and a needle and gave it to her, and disappeared without a word.

The next day at class, her friend confronted her with these words: The button is the shoelace, isn’t it? Yes, she answered, ever since that day her mother stroked her hair, through all those years–and long after she had died–she had this secret covenant with her mother. I go through life supplying what is missing.

Blessing begets blessing. When we are treated gently, gentleness grows in us. We all make an unconscious secret covenant with those who have blessed us, who have stroked our hair gently. To bless is to speak well, especially to those who seldom hear words of affirmation. To bless is to see well, especially those who are invisible. To bless is to pass on well, especially to those whose legacy is harsh and fractured.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are blessing to this teacher. May all their acts of kindness bring hope and joy to those who are "luchorupan"an Old Irish word meaning "small body" or invisible.

Temptation to Be the Seed for Good

Once upon a time, a pilgrim set out on a long journey in search of peace, joy and love. The pilgrim walked for many weary miles, and time passed.

Gradually, the young, lively steps became slower and more labored. The pilgrim’s journey passed through landscapes that were not always happy ones. Through war, Through sickness. Through quarrels and rejections and separations. A land where, it seemed, the more people possessed, the more evil they became–the more they had to defend, the more they needed to attack each other. Longing for peace, they prepared for war. Longing for love, they surrounded themselves with walls of distrust and barriers of fear. Longing for life, they were walking deeper into death.

But one morning, the pilgrim came to a littler cottage at the wayside. Something about this little cottage attracted the pilgrim. It was as though it was lit up inside. Full of curiosity, the pilgrim went inside. And inside the cottage was a little shop, and behind the counter stood a shopkeeper. It was hard to judge the age–hard even to say for sure whether it was a man or a woman. There was an air of timelessness about the place.

What would you like? asked the shopkeeper in a kindly voice. What do you stock here? asked the pilgrim. Oh, we have all the things here that you most long for, replied the shopkeeper. Just tell me what you desire. The pilgrim hardly knew where to begin. So many desires came rushing to mind. I want peace –in my own family, in my native land and in the whole world. I want to make something good of my life. I want those who are sick to be well again and those who are lonely to have friends. I want those who are hungry to have enough to eat. I want every child born on this planet to have a chance to be educated. I want everyone on earth to live in freedom. I want this world to be a kingdom of love. There was a pause, while the pilgrim reviewed this shopping list. Gently, the shopkeeper broke in. I’m sorry, came the quiet reply. I should have explained. We don’t supply the fruits here. We only supply the seeds.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that in this Season of Lent you help each of us blossom with your seeds of peace, love and joy.

A Time to Bloom

It’s that time of year, when we fret about what to give up for Lent. Grandma made the choice for a college lad who let out a stream of obscenities when he spilled his beer. She simply remarked: "You eat with that mouth." So first for Lent, watch what comes out of your mouth, for what comes out tells what is inside your heart. Using foul, dirty language or telling a smutty joke may make you feel important or special. But it betrays the fact that you are not one of the gang. Remember, coming to receive your ashes means you are one of Christ’s gang. You are God’s child, and God’s children simply do not talk like that.
A second lenten practice is to keep judgments from spilling out of your mouth. Maybe you can pick one day to be especially mindful to keep your judgments to yourself. Friday is a good choice in honor of Jesus’ crucifixion. This was also the day when he granted paradise to the good thief, someone we would have deemed unworthy of God’s attention. And so for each Friday of Lent, make no judgments about people, about their motives, their goodness or badness, their social standing, their defects, the way they talk, their clothing, their color, their jobs, their mistakes. Just see everyone as God’s children.
Third, try to control the verbal negatives that so readily comes from our mouths. I’m thinking about the subtle put-downs, the jabs that hurt, the insults, the criticism, the sarcasm, the harmful gossip, the rumors that smear. Again, if too much of a challenge to do every day of Lent, you may want to choose Wednesday as your no-negative-words day, as tradition holds that this was the day Judas let the words which betrayed Jesus fall from his mouth.
A fourth practice is to let the word "no" fall more often from your mouth. After all your "nos" define you every bit as your "yeses." Jesus is our guide. When he cured the man possessed of a demon and the man wanted to follow him, he said no. "Go home to your friends, and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and what mercy he has shown you." You will give glory to God if you bloom where you’re planted. When Pilate questioned Jesus, he shook his head no and refused to answer, for he knew Pilate wasn’t really after the truth. He said no to pain-dulling hyssop offered to him on the cross. Jesus said no to turning stones into bread for he did not come to serve himself. So be like Jesus for Lent. Say no to the Apprentice nonsense on your cable. No to radio talk show hosts who make fun of people. Say no to drugs to keep you up all night to complete your school projects–try peppermint tea instead! Say no to drinking till you blackout. Say no to drugs that lie telling you there’s no harm. Say no to cheating. Say no to lies. Say no to marketing which wants you to buy more than you need. But say yes to the truth. Say yes to words that encourage and heal. Say yes to grandma’s words of wisdom. Say yes to small acts of kindness, charitable deeds and sharing. Say yes to prayer time. Say yes to get your studies and projects completed. Say yes to your family’s need for your presence and time. Say yes to Jesus.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that this Lent nourishes our souls to grow strong in your love and wisdom. May our Lenten workout keep us fit for the mission ahead to make your Kingdom bloom here on earth as it is in heaven.

The Designated Friend

Once upon a time, four friends brought a seriously ill buddy down from the rooftop and asked Jesus for a favor. Without hesitation, Jesus heals their friend but the editor wrote this line"..they were unable to get near Jesus because of the crowd." I often wonder about certain folks who find it difficult to get near the Lord because there’s something or someone, blocking their way. Let me share a story in the form of an allegory about people who feel guilty about their past and live in the "The City of Regret"

I had not really planned to take a trip this year, yet I found myself packing anyway. And off I went, dreaming it. I was on another guilt trip. I booked my reservations on Wish I Had airlines. I didn’t check my bags since everyone carries their bags on this airline. And I could see that people from all over the world were with like me dragging under the weight of bags they had packed themselves. I caught a cab to Last Resort Hotel, the driver taking the whole trip backwards, looking over his shoulder. And there I found the ballroom where my event would be held: The Annual Pity Party. As I checked in, I saw all my old colleagues were on the guest list: The Done Family–Woulda, Coulda, and Shoulda; both of the members of the Opportunity family were there–Missed and Lost. All the Yesterdays were there, too; there were too many to count, but all would have sad stories to share. Shattered Dreams and Broken Promises would be there, too, along with their friends Don’t Blame Me and I Couldn’t Help It. And of course, hours of entertainment would be provided by that renowned storyteller It’s Their Fault. As I prepared to settle in for a really long night, I realized that one person had the power to send all those people home and break up the party: me. All I had to do was, with some help, was to return to the present and welcome the new day with hope.

Unfortunately, many people suffer with their guilt from the past, always looking over their shoulders, always rehearsing what might have been, should have been, would have been, Always licking old wounds like a divorce, a betrayal, a disappointment, an unfairness–that’s a lot of people blocking the way. No wonder they are unable to get near Jesus. Our phobias, fears, defeats, sins and guilt get in the way. But hopefully you have friends who accept you as you are and will take you to meet their good buddy Jesus. The man from the City of Regret said that, with the help of a good friend, he could look to the future of love rather than a past of regret.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that they reach out to someone and help them bypass the crowd–those ghostly shades of regret, guilt and despair–and bring them to Jesus, because the fact is that they won’t get there without you. Or, to put it simple, YOU ARE THEIR DESIGNATED FRIEND.

The Face of God

Another grey day in Rochester and storms along the Atlantic coast can make everyday seem so dull and boring. So let me invite you to pick up your lens and search for that stunning shot and discover God in the everyday-ness of life. A teacher shared that young people sometimes have a difficult time seeing how the sacred relates to their ordinary experience. Holy lies beyond the everyday. The holy, the young say, and some adults, can only be experienced inside a church building but it has little to say to the rest of the week. In my ministry with pilots during 9/11, I learned how these flyers loved their work because it helped them "touch the face of God." So I ask my Sonshine Friends to reflect on an activity that has allowed you to "touch the face of God." I remember hiking in Isle Royale which on your local weather map looks like the eye of a dog in upper Lake Michigan. On the trail, I was searching for moose in the hope of snapping a stunning photo. Instead, I walked by this log that had dandelions swaying in the breeze and got down on my belly to snap this ordinary moment. At times, I prefer to distance myself from technology to an old way of life. It was nice just to feel the morning chill, hear the birds chirp, smell the pine trees, and just look around to see the birds, hear a woodpecker or avoid "moose droppings." The image of these puffy seeds, hugging the ground makes one realize that God’s Presence can be found on many levels.

We take lots of things for granted, the song of birds, the falling snow, the meandering scuttle of ants, the chirp of crickets, everything that God created. So often we look for God in the spectacular miracles, but there’s more to life than what appears on the surface–in the midst of the ordinary, natural settings of everyday life. More often we "touch the face of God" in the routine of life, in ordinary things and people, if we but notice. For behind what we see everyday, the people and our experiences, is a Presence, a caring God, a transcendent love. Valentine’s Day is everyday when we look and "touch the face of God" in wiping a tear, sharing a snack, laughing or smiling at our friends who reveal the beauty of God in our everyday boring, dull and resurrected hearts. Roses, stars, snow, sky, clouds, flower, thunder, birds, rocks, pathways, storms, sea, thorns, tree–are all ordinary. All reveal the face of God.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends as we go about our ordinary lives may we take notice of the glorious ways you fill our life with beauty and love. Let us pray that we may discover you in the healing, the forgiving, the kindness, the generosity, the caring that goes on in our everyday boring, dull routine. Pray deeply for those around you. For God’s strength. For God’s love. For God’s Presence. Happy Valentine!

Hunger for Healing

Statistics report 85 % of the people who visit a doctor are ill because of stress. The stressors range from traumas caused by auto accidents, hurricanes, tsunamis, tornados, assaults, robberies, rapes, plane crashes school shootings, fires, and other catastrophic events. Then we "hit the wall" or burnout from stress about money, jobs, conflicts with family, our health and the weather.

In gospel times, everyday stress was caused by demons which today we would label as some clinical disorder. However, there was a hunger for healing when word spread that Jesus was in your village. The sick might be a mother-in-law, an unclean spirit, a leper, someone dangling from your rooftop on a cot, a withered hand on a Sabbath. Each cry was a hunger for healing, and Jesus healed them. And I would like to suggest the same is true for you and me. We too have a hunger for healing inside of us, for ourselves, our family, our friends, so many people. Jesus said: "Those who are well have no need of a physician; but those who are diseased need a physician. I, Jesus, have come to heal those who are sick." In other words, Jesus was and still is the Great Physician.

But be honest and ask yourself, what is the unhealthy stress in your life at this moment? Are you really well? What Jesus really wants and needs from you is a hunger in your heart for a healing of those relationships, those conflicts, those stressors which are causing disabilities in yourself. Jesus wants us to have a hunger for healing inside our souls.
Let me share an image to help you heal from your pain and disease. Once upon a time, a little girl with leukemia was asked to imagine in her mind how her cancer was being cured. Our little girl imagined a river of life. She believed that it was like a river of white blood cells, and those white blood cells washed around the tumor at every side of it. That river of cells was washing her tumor away.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that we imagine our tumors of despair and sickness being washed away by your healing power. Let us pray for our own wellness and pray deeply for the wellness of those around you. Pray deeply. Persistently. For God’s strength. For God’s healing. For God’s Presence

Rainbow Bridge

I received an unusual request last evening to offer a prayer for a Sonshine friend who had the difficult task to inform a dear friend that her dear kitty had died while she was away at a conference. Dennis and Stanley were brothers boarding at the vet’s who decided to give these cats their routine shots. Somehow the "routine" procedure turned into a nightmare for Dennis had gone into shock and died. Poor Stanley would be returning home without his brother and our Sonshine friend needed a prayer for words of comfort to tell this mom that her furry friend would not be coming home. So my prayer is for all my Sonshine Friends who miss their furry friends in the hope that someday we will walk with them into heaven.

Once upon a time... just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water, and sunshine and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who have been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; his eager body begins to quiver. Suddenly, he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend (like Dennis) finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kitty kisses (feels like sandpaper) caress your face; your hands again stroke the silky head and his whiskers tickle as you once more look into the trusting eyes of your dear pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who brought home stranded friends like Dennis and Stanley. We miss their purrs, rolling in the catnip and holding them close on our laps when alone. Let our hearts never forget the gift these creatures great and small brought into our homes and may the happy memories bring us comfort and strength as we look forward to the moment when we will once again cross over Rainbow Bridge together.

Easy Off

I was cleaning my "old fashion" 1960 Hotpoint oven with "Easy Off Grill and Oven Cleaner." I think this label is an illusion because believe me there’s nothing "EASY" cleaning a dirty old clunker oven. The directions say crank up the heat to 475, wait a half hour and then spray. For best results, let stand 24 hours and there you have it-- a shiny, clean oven. Don’t believe the directions! I got out an old dish rag and started scrubbing. Sure some grease came OFF easily but then there were those darn stubborn, burnt on grease spots. That old dish rag took a beating, then I thought how God is like that old dish rag. I come to God when things are "greasy" in my life and I think there’s an easy solution to the problem so just grab the can of "EASY OFF." However, it’s not enough to get the job done. God, like that old dish rag, takes a beating in my messes. I rinse out the black grease and the oven is getting cleaner but that poor old rag is also getting ragged and stained. Yet, as I scrub the walls of the oven–my soul--the rag in my hand is the spirit that says we’ll work on this together. No, your old oven may not shine like new as the label promised, but let me help you with this awful chore. Of course, if you own a self-cleaning oven you don’t have a clue what I’m going through. After the job, that dish rag was in bad shape, soiled and dirty but the fabric was strong and it worked with me on a messy job until we both looked and said–good enough! EASY OFF does say if you have stubborn stains, like your obsessive, negative attitudes or behaviors–ranting, raving, gossip, jealousy, resentment-- that’s a whole like a grease-- you might want to give the oven a second dose of cleaner to wipe out those stubborn stains. Well, isn’t that just like God to say you can grab me anytime when you find yourself in another greasy mess and I will help you scrub and wipe clean those sins. It’s hard work trying to be perfect, but God, our old dish rag, is waiting for our hand to take a hold and together wipe down those stains until we feel and look better and reflect the shine of God’s grace. So next time you grab a hold of that old dish rag, think of God working with you on your cleaning problems-- your lifestyle messes. Notice how the rag is stained, like God who took on our stains and weaknesses. We toss the rag into the washer, yet you know it will never look the same–just check out today’s photo. Our oven is a lot cleaner, perfect "heck no" but thank God he marks us on a curve so we don’t have to fear when the EASY OFF doesn’t quite do the job. Simply grab your dish rag again and again and know that God hears your cries for help to wipe up those greasy parts of your life with plenty of LOVE and MERCY.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends when things get greasy let us never fear to take your hand to clean off some of the stains that keep us from being a light of goodness to others. Through our stubborn stains may you be our cleanser of hope.

Faithfulness & Mercy

When we think of special friends, we often think of words that describe their particular personality or some aspect of their association with us. "He is so generous"–I’m thinking of you Stan always helping your friends and neighbors. "She’s a good friend." I’m thinking of you Penny praying for your friends and parishioners. "He is so faithful." I’m thinking of you right now Scott caring for your dying old dog.
When we think of God, two words that come to mind are faithfulness and mercy. In the scriptures these are the "windows" through which we catch a glimpse of who God is and how God acts.
Many people are truly afraid. There are many people who have many fears - - and I might add, rightly so. There are circumstances in life which promote one to fear. We call them storms. The story I share with you now is very old - in fact, you might have heard it. But everytime I think of it, my heart is encouraged about the window in which I see our God.
The ship was on a cruise. It was hit by a terrible storm. All on board were obviously quite afraid. One of the passengers noticed a small boy who apparently was not moved by the storm at all. The confidence of the boy was really noted. "Don't you think we will be lost and all drowned?" "Oh, no," the boy replied. "I've been out on deck and my dad is at the helm. My daddy is at the wheel."
When we have a strong sense of God being at the controls - there is a sense of peace that floods the heart. There is a security received. Even as I write these lines I think about the people I counsel daily who are going through various storms. We might say to ourselves that we are about to drown, but we need to look out the window that sees God as faithful and merciful and ready to help us in our storms for "our Heavenly Father is at the helm."
Today we need to pray for the grace to hear the psalm spoken to us: "My faithfulness and my mercy shall be with you." Psalm 89:25.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that during a time of storm they can have their fear calmed by being mindful of your presence and your power. Through it all may their situation be put in the lifeboat of trust. Let this photo center you for a moment in your storm and allow God to bathe you with peace of mind and soul.