The Bucket List

Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman star in the movie “The Bucket List.” Without spoiling the plot, I’ll simply share that these two men met as patients in a hospital where they faced the grim reality of their mortality. One patient found comfort in his faith. His roommate thought the idea of faith was only an illusion or at best a myth to get people through difficult times. Despite their differences, they agreed to begin a final journey together. While hilariously entertaining, there are moments in this flick that make one think about our limited time on earth and our relationships with one another. Before these condemned men “kick the bucket,” our stars launched on a crazy journey to accomplish a list of things unfinished in life. Using your imagination, you would be right to assume that their list contained all the exotic places that you and I have yet to travel in our lifetime.

Overlooking the pyramids, our travelers were admiring the ancient pharoah’s tombs and peering into the endless star filled sky. The man of faith made the comment to his fellow traveler that the ancient Egyptians held the belief that before one could enter into the next kingdom that person had to answer two questions. Our cynical traveler took the bait and reluctantly asked what they were.

1. Have you been joyful in this life?
2. How have you shared your joy with others?

When are you joyful these days? I know behind the lens capturing the light of a stunning image brings me joy. Or, it might be a simple poinsettia bloom nestled with hundreds of other plants or at pre-dawn capturing the subtle light that veils the valley below. Sometimes, it might be arranging a Spring bouquet of flowers to give as a gift to family or friends or brushing Rhythm, a horse blind in one eye that I ride to relax and forget the troubles of the week.

Then there is that second profound question, how have I brought joy to others? How might you answer that before the throne of God? I can look back and think of a little green puppet that was given to me as a gift over 30 years ago. I called this stuffed toy “Spinach.” That was the name on the label and the name hundreds of kids remember to this day. Before Catholic schools were closed, I would go into the classroom and take Spinach with me and teach the stories about Jesus’ love to the children. That was pure joy!

So often in our Catholic teaching we hear the message that speaks of service and sacrifice and mercy that reflects the way of Christ as he walked with his children. We have been told for millennia to imitate that same love for others in caring for the sick, the poor, the imprisoned and the “little ones” which refer to those made to feel unworthy. But I like this Egyptian perspective that joy enters into our life and faith and becomes the guiding star in all our relationships. I believe that God wants us to be a people of joy and to bring that joy to others.

What is your joy in this life? How have you brought your joy to others?

God prays for us as we reflect: “You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand." (Psalm 16:11).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that they may be filled with many moments of joy like hugging their grandkids, seeing beautiful vistas, and sharing moments at table with family and friends. May your grace help us all to bring that same joy to others.

Rise and Shine

And what about that star? Astronomers, theologians and historians for hundreds of years have been trying to determine exactly which star might have led the Magi to the stable.

A more recent conjecture has come from a Notre Dame astrophysicist, Dr. Grant Mathews. The professor says that he had hoped the answer would be something spectacular like a supernova. But two years of research led him to a more ordinary conclusion - the heavenly sign around the time of the birth of Jesus Christ was likely an unusual alignment of planets, the sun and the moon.

He believes the Christmas star is probably an alignment of planets, the most likely of which would have occurred on April 17, 6 B.C., when the sun, Jupiter, the moon and Saturn aligned in the constellation Aries while Venus and Mars were in neighboring constellations. He makes that conclusion because he believes the Magi were Zoroastrian astrologers who would have recognized the planetary alignment in Aries as a sign that a powerful leader was born. In fact it would have even meant that the leader was destined to die at an appointed time.

I believe that the star in the sky over Bethlehem is the flare for us that God does and will continue to rescue us as His children. That star is our hope in this world of darkness and despair. The star in Bethlehem is our search for acceptance and understanding and peace. On Friday, I was visiting a patient afraid of surgery that she is having this morning to replace her pacemaker.

She said, "My whole body is bothering me. But the body isn't the worst part. It's my soul that has me worried. All this talk of side effects like dying from the surgery really scares me. I haven't been able to sleep very well the past few nights. I just lay awake like I'm watching a replay of my whole life as it passes before my eyes. I don't like what I see. I could have done a lot better with my life. I've been a religious person, I've been pretty regular at church and all, but I don't know.... something is just not right. I don't have any peace about it all. Actually, I think I'm afraid to die. I'm afraid to meet God. What will God think about a person like me? Does God's love include me? Am I included in God's eternal plans?"

The Epiphany answer to the question: “Am I included in God's eternal plans is a resounding YES!” Epiphany shows that Jesus came for all people, no matter what!

Life can be overwhelmingly dark, especially at some special moments of our history. Today I am happy and tomorrow I have a stroke. Today I am smiling and tomorrow a car hits my child. Today I am rich and tomorrow I am poor when my plant closes and I am laid off. Today I am a success and tomorrow a failure. Life’s little candles of happiness are so fragile and easily snuffed out.

But there is one light that is never snuffed out. There is one light that always shines in the darkness. There is one light that darkness cannot overcome, and that is Jesus Christ.

God prays for us as we reflect: "Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you.” (Isaiah 60:1).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends and new online friends who are searching for your light. Christ is our Star. As we try to navigate our ways through life, there is only one star that can guide us, and that star is Jesus Christ. Never lose sight of that star.

Letting Things Settle

It was Christmas 1978, and I was set on a mission to find the toy of the year—the infamous Cabbage Patch doll. They had sold out quickly, but I was asked to help a mother find the only remaining Cabbage Patch doll in the nation for her little girl. It was the week before Christmas and all the stores were sold out. But I made a few calls to JC Penny’s Worldwide Headquarters who put me in touch with their West Coast warehouse. Two days before Christmas, the Cabbage Patch doll arrived at this mother’s door.

Now it’s Christmas 2007, and the “next impossible gift” request turns out to be a snow globe with the statue of a reindeer inside. Mind you not some silly Rudolph prancing around the North Pole but an image worthy of National Geographic. This family loved “reindeer” decorations. Thirty years later, I can go online to “shop the world” to search for this unique gift. But, my quest came up empty except for a few poor, plastic images of Rudolph dancing around Santa’s sleigh. Not quite the quality reindeer I had hoped to find.

Snow globes have a certain wonder and fascination for me. A scene encased in water, you pick up the globe, shake it and watch the "snow" magically rise up in a swirl and cover the scene. Set it down and gradually things settled and became clear.

In some ways the days after Christmas can offer such clarity. The Christmas stories represent a very special intervention of God in the human condition, they reveal to us just how much God loves us, one that, as G.K. Chesterton said, turned the world upside down and, astonishingly, when viewed from that perspective the world made sense.

God, in the words of the Irish Dominican poet, Paul Murray, loves us so much that if we should cease to exist, he would die of sadness. The Christmas stories reveal to us that God loved Her human children so much that He took on human form so that he could show us how to live and how to die, even walking with us down to the valley of death itself.

Like the colorful glitter in a snow globe –we can easily get caught up in the swirl of busyness that can be a tempting distraction to get lost in. Yet – how often do we feel lost? We don't know who we are. We lose our sense of clarity. Everything seems confused. New Year's resolutions are about spending time more with special friends, exercise, and dieting. Instead, we get distracted by more meetings to attend, e-mails to answer, crisis to resolve, credit card debt and we lose sight of our number one goal to simply be a more happy person.

I like to suggest that these first days of this New Year can be days of grace, to be still and let the activity drop away. To adapt a phrase: Don't just do something – sit there and pray. Before you toss away those Christmas cards in the recycling bin—read again slowly and pray in gratitude for your friends, which is the way God, reveals how much she truly loves you.

God prays for us as we reflect: “The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace.” (Psalm 29:11).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who in this New Year have mountains that need to be conquered, temptations to overcome; feelings to be mastered and problems to be solved. In you are found the answers and in you are found the strength to carry on. Bless my friends as they climb and overcome the swirl of life with you their Heavenly Guide.

Rudolf, Won't You Guide My Sleigh Tonight?

Santa's most popular reindeer by far is Rudolf, Rudolf, the red-nosed reindeer. Here is his story as told in music by Johnny Marks: Rudolf, the red-nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose. And if you ever saw him, you would even say it glows. All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names. They never let poor Rudolf play in any reindeer games. Then one foggy Christmas Eve Santa came to say: "Rudolf with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?" Then all the reindeer loved him as they shouted out with glee: "Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer, you'll go down in history!" The story of Rudolf is the story of salvation. It is our story both as individuals and as the human family. In our own case it is not Santa who saves us but the Child Jesus.

To begin with, Rudolf was a misfit. Compared to the image of the ideal reindeer we can say that something was definitely wrong with him. What is more, he was not in any position to help himself. So are we all, misfits: "We are like sheep who have gone astray" (Isaiah 53:6). Like lost sheep we are not in a position to help ourselves. Rudolf could not help himself. All that his fellow reindeer did was to makes things worse for him. Only one person could help him, Santa, the messenger from heaven.

Soon, we will celebrate the birth of the Messenger from heaven. He comes to liberate us from the human predicament, our self-centeredness. Our self-destructive ways turn us into a despicable Rudolf, the red-nosed reindeer. But the heavenly Messenger comes, not to take away the “red nose” but to declare to us the Good News that we are acceptable to God even with the red nose. Rudolf's red nose was a defect. But Santa chose him precisely on account of that. The heavenly Messenger has the ability to turn the defects and red noses of our tainted humanity into assets for the service of God. Jesus is this heavenly messenger.

What makes the reindeer gospel so poignant is that Santa does not use his magic wand to heal Rudolf of his red nose defect. He let him go on with the red nose even as his chosen reindeer. Certainly Rudolf would have wanted to be a normal reindeer like all the rest. Similarly Jesus does not simply make us good men and women, rather he makes us into people who can use all their strengths and defects to the service and the glory of God. This is the proof to us that it is not by our own will power that we are able to become children of God. It is by God's grace, by God's unmerited and unconditional love of us.

You can imagine how Rudolf felt when he heard the words of Santa, "Rudolf with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?" That is why we call it the Good News. It is news that is liberating and empowering. It empowers us by changing our former disposition of insecurity, despair and hopelessness into that of blessed assurance, new hope and enthusiasm in the Lord's service.

God prays for us as we reflect: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who feel like misfits. Our “red noses” that point to our inner shame and disfigure the beauty that God sees within us. Like Rudolf before Santa, let us listen to the Message that the Christ Child brings us, let us commit ourselves into his service without looking back, even when we do not know where the journey will lead us, knowing one thing for sure: that the grace of God will supply the strength we need for the long journey of faith ahead. A Blessed Christmas.

Ice Your Pain

Ironic that after a stellar annual physical, two hours later, I fall on a patch of ice on my back and I am in pain! What a way to start the week before Christmas? Thank God that He is in our "pain" of living. Everyday I listen to the pain of people buried with fears of losing a job, a spouse, or health. And, who likes pain? Not this priest especially when the pull rope on the snow blower refused to start the motor and my back is screaming in pain. This is the kind of pain that drops you to your knees. I literally felt like the words in Psalm: 38:7: “My back is filled with searing pain; there is no health in my body.”

However suffering and pain needs to be addressed in our lives. O Come, O Come Emmanuel means “God is with us in us—especially when we are “in pain.” I believe God has some lesson and opportunity for us in pain. But, does it have to come during a snowstorm? Come on Lord, what is the mystery to pain? James states it this way in 5:11: “As you know we consider blessed those who have preserved. You have heard of Job's perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about… The Lord is full of compassion and mercy."

When I try to deal with the mystery of suffering and pain my thoughts turn to the homebound who have no more strength to fight the system. I think of a Sonshine Friend whose home care and nursing services have put her health at risk. Sometimes due to our pain, we no longer have the strength to want to go on. We feel alone in our pain. However, I tried to remind her on a snowy Sunday afternoon that she has the dignity of her soul and her faith and to keep on praying.

It is interesting that the treatment for pain recommended after the fall is ice and later warmth to help in the healing process. Sometimes when our prayers are not answered we think that God has the heart of ice. It is our perseverance that will lead to the warmth of God’s comfort.

Keep in mind that our pain is not meaningless. We pray for a cure or at least some relief but it seems God has not answered our prayer. The things we count as refusals are simply delays, which we can't understand in the natural. In pain, which I feel, I lift my eyes to my Redeemer. It need not be meaningless. I ask God to remove the pain; if not I ask God to reveal his lessons and truths through it. There are those watching my reaction and response.

God pray for us as we reflect: “I am in pain and distress; may your salvation, O God, protect me.” (Psalm 69:29).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine friends who are indeed in pain - physically - or in a situation that is "painful." I ask that you give them relief and when on their knees you bless them with strength and grace to endure for the Kingdom.

Always in a Hurry

What kind of waiter are you? I don’t mean folks who serve your table at restaurants, but people who wait. There are those who remain patient and calm no matter what circumstance, but they are rare. Far more common are the impatient ones who pace and tap and glance at their watches; who, when you finally arrive, let you know exactly how late you are; who weave in and out of traffic trying to get one car ahead of the others; who get into the express lane at the supermarket with their basket far over the twelve-item limit, who are always in a hurry.

There are the multitaskers with their cell phones, blueberries and palm pilots who can’t abide the solitude and silence so necessary for emotional and spiritual growth. Then, there are those who simply can’t wait at all, like the children who ask, “when is Santa coming?”

I realize that there are times when we have to actually "hurry". But the normal pace, must be kept slower...for our sake and the sake of others as well. I don't ever recall reading that Jesus was on the run.

Jesus was master of the art of spending time. He never let it master him. He did not give the impression of dashing about Palestine trying to save time and keep to a schedule.

He knew that his working days were short. He said so. There was an air of urgency about him, but there was no feverish hurrying. He had time to sit and talk with individuals along the way. He paused to play with little children. He took time off to spend whole hours in prayer. But was it taking time off? Off from what? Jesus was not keeping to a calendar. He was fulfilling a life.

Folks at the Blue Christmas Healing Mass had the opportunity to slow down a little from the hectic pace and "smell the roses". But, I know, some are thinking, "Well, if you knew what I was going through you would think different!" Actually, I do know what some are going through.

As I was leaving the chapel, the last person expressed her thanks for the healing service because she was going through tests for lupus. Sometimes, the news is bad. It's the pits!! But I also know someone who is waiting for us to reach up through our difficulties and touch Him.

God prays for us as we reflect: "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God." (John 14:1).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that they listen to your whisper that says: “I am here.” Then they could put up with anything, could wait forever.

Keep On Keeping On

On Sunday, a special message was read in all the churches from our bishop. It said “we are adrift. Sadly, a litany of hurts in recent years has resulted in a severe drop of church attendance, a severe shortage of vocations, the closing of churches and a drop in respect for our religious leaders. The Catholic community is adrift in the pain of the abuse scandal, and the scandal that plagues communities in conflict over how to make Christ present in our modern world. The bishop invited all his parishes to join him in a season of renewal beginning in Lent.

Then an “ angel” appeared in our midst. She appeared in the form of a young college student by the name of Carolyn. She bounced up eagerly to the lectern to make her announcement. In a voice that caught your attention, she announced that a group of students at Brockport College were talking about the poor, the cold and winter. They decided that they wanted to do something to make a difference. So she had come to announce that these students would be collecting blankets to give to the poor during the winter months. She asked the community to check their closets at home and donate a blanket to keep the poor warm this winter. She had bought a blanket to donate and you could see her face light up, as she knew this was what Jesus wants her to do. Her inspiration and sincerity lifted the hearts of the community with a message that simply said, “Keep on keeping on.”

Are you in a situation where it appears to be the "same old, same old"? Like our church adrift, maybe you need a lift from our angel Carolyn.

Whenever I have a troubled patient in my office, I remind them of this story. Did you ever noticed that when the Lord told the discouraged fishermen to cast their nets again it was right in that same old place where they had been working all night, and had caught nothing?

If we could only go off to some new place every time we get discouraged, trying again would be an easier thing. If we could be somebody else, or go somewhere else, or do something else, it might not be hard to have fresh faith and courage; but it is the same old net in the same old pond for most of us.

Everyday is a new day where old faults are to be conquered, where old hurts and discouragements are to be forgiven, where we have failed yesterday we are to face again today. We will win success “where we are” when we pray to God, who knows that “despite” all our disheartening efforts that we call failures, He bids us to "Keep on keeping on.”

God prays for us as we reflect: “Indeed we are called blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of the perseverance of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, because, the Lord is compassionate and merciful.” (James 5:11)

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are caught up in their hurts and resentments from the past. Bless them to "hang in there" and to know that you are with them. We are where we are at this moment. May this one make the best of it without complaining.

God Loves You Too Much!

"God loves you just the way you are, but he loves you too much to let you stay that way." I love these words and this stunning image of Jesus on the cross taken inside the Church of the Immacula on the campus of San Diego University reminds me of Christ’s first words on the cross: "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

Just what have you done? After the turkey and football, comes the shopping frenzy. On Black Friday, people spent 10.3 billion in search of happiness. The compulsive urge to buy is strong when vendors tell us “to give in to the urge.” However, in this age of the internet, the buying frenzy for the holiday actually begins today on Cyber Monday when 68 million people will place their orders online.

Christ's life on earth was lived for others. He relinquished his self to live for others. We are called upon to do the same. Especially as we enter upon another season of Christmas buying madness, we need to constantly remind ourselves about where our true values should be. Christ has shown us the way to true happiness, and it doesn't come from anything in this world. Eternal life begins with our relinquishing of the things of this world.

But let me turn your attention to the best Christmas gift you might consider for yourself. The example comes from the request of the Good Thief: it is never too late to make a conversion, to turn our lives around and better arrange our priorities.

The thief asks only that Jesus remember him when he comes into his kingdom. And yet, just because he calls upon Jesus in his dying moments, our Lord promises not only to remember him in the next world but that today he will be with him in Paradise. The thief can die in peace.

It is the same for us. As long as there is breath in our bodies, forgiveness and salvation are always a possibility. As long as there is a "today", then conversion can happen. And our Lord will not only forgive us our sins but bring us to live with him forever. All we need to do is to remember that life consists of being with Christ because where Christ is, there is the kingdom.

Christ prays for us as we reflect: “Help us, God our Savior, for the glory of your name. Deliver us, pardon our sins for your name’s sake.”
(Psalm 79:9).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are in need of conversion. Help us to root out pride and greed and allow your forgiveness to flow through our veins. Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Paving the Road to Thanksgiving

This weekend, I received a letter from my doctor confirming my annual physical exam in December. The letter detailed the lab work that needs to be done prior to the visit. When I turned the page, there were eight boxes checked for lab tests. I thought that enough blood would be taken to satisfy a vampire, until the letter stated, “there is a possibility that additional blood work may be requested after your exam.” God help me!

If I wasn’t feeling run down by the approach of another holiday season, this letter set me up for more moaning and complaining. No doubt, we are already annoyed by marketing that began in September to “shop till we drop” which “zaps” our bodies resistance and makes us prone to colds and viruses. However, as we prepare to travel to sit at table with our family and friends on Thanksgiving Day, let me offer this prescription to health.

A holy monk gave this teaching to visitors at the monastery. He encouraged the people to practice gratefulness as a spiritual exercise that transforms a person who is given to moping and complaining to a person radiant with joy.

The visitors were advised to start each day by writing out a list of things they were grateful for. They were encouraged to keep a notepad by their bed, and each day before beginning their morning meditation, they take a few minutes to make a list of 7-8 items that they are grateful for that day.

I can’t begin to describe how powerful this simple exercise has been in my life in promoting healing at the level of mind, body and spirit. By starting each day with my gratitude list, I consciously shift my attention to the many blessings in life. This is light years away from my previous pattern of starting off too many days bemoaning the “insurmountable obstacles that I believed (inaccurately) lied ahead of me. What a difference this awareness makes!

In short, I am thoroughly convinced that gratitude – which I define as a sincere sense of appreciation for God’s presence in the form of the many blessings in our lives. For example, the doctor who doesn’t need my blood but he wants to make sure that all my “bodily systems” are running well. Gratitude paves the way for the healing and positive outcomes that we are seeking.

If you are struggling with any form of crisis in your life, I would urge you to set aside a few minutes each morning to compose your own daily gratitude list. If your experience is anything like mine, you will find that the results arte nothing short of miraculous.

God prays for us as we reflect: "You changed my mourning into dancing and clothed me with gladness. With my whole being I sing endless praise to you. O Lord, my God, forever I will give you thanks forever.” (Psalm 30: 12-13).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends whose presence in my life I am most humbly grateful. May their spiritual journey be paved with many signs of your holy presence and blessings in their life. May I suggest that at your Thanksgiving table, each person take a moment to express gratitude to God for their precious children, grandchildren, and all relatives and friends and truly give thanks.

Shifting Through the Ashes

On the fourth day of the San Diego firestorm, the lead story featured respiratory doctors offering advice on how best to cope with the fallen ash particles from the firestorm. “Stay indoors” was their advice. However, 1500 families were in shock when they discovered that their homes were completely destroyed. They were advised to wear R95 masks as they began the slow process of recovery by shifting through the ruins.

One local reporter asked a teenager how she was handling the lost of her home. Sarah is only 15, yet this was she second time in her life that she was shifting through the rumble of her burned out home. Her home had burned down four years ago in the Cedar Fires. At that time, she was devastated losing her clothes, family photos and toys from her childhood. In the Witch Fire of 2007, she had dug out ceramic mugs in the rubble. Again, she felt pretty sad, but it somehow did not bother her as much as before. In a profound moment, she made this comment to the reporter: “Half the stuff I had I didn’t need.”

When families received their reverse 911 call to evacuate, they were told to take only the essentials. The baby, diapers, formula, medicines and the dog. Some folks who had a little more time and grabbed their important documents and the family photos.

God tells us to be prepared because we do not know the day nor the hour when we might be called upon to “evacuate this earth.” At that moment, we might agree with Sarah’s insight that “half the stuff we have been carrying in this life we did not need.”

What excess baggage are you carrying at this moment? No need to carry resentment in the trunk (the acid causes pain in your gut). No need to lock the anger behind your eyes (the headaches are a pain in the brain). No need to be plagued by fears of shame locked in our closets (the lack of sleep leads to chronic fatigue). All this baggage results in poor health, a weak heart and a troubled soul. The only thing that matters to God is your safety. His divine mercy protects us from the fires of hell, the fires in our life. God’s love will quench our thirst for acceptance, understanding and any fear about our futures.

What do you most need from God? Watching those families pick through the rumble, a neighbor would simply come over and give them a big hug. A gesture of hope that was meant to restore their courage to rebuild their home one brick at a time. Let this message be my hug for each of you who find themselves shifting through the ashes.

God prays for us as we reflect: “May the Lord direct your hearts to the love of God's and Christ's perseverance.” Thessalonians 3:5

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine friends who have lost everything in a fire or any storm of life. Renew their broken spirit, bring healing and comfort and focus our eyes on the love that comes from the generosity of others.

Ashes of Life

I often ask my patients to name their stress and put it on a scale of 1-10. Their pain or affliction may come from some past hurts from in-laws, or lost of job, or worse, the fear of losing their health due to some trauma. During the recent San Diego firestorm, I had the privileged of meeting a very “gentle and humble” soul. Archie was no stranger to affliction since he had been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease five years ago. However, he daily practiced the lessons of faith and courage in coping with his afflictions.

Archie waited anxiously for the latest news from his son Kyle whose family had evacuated from the San Diego firestorms. He knew this family had safely evacuated their home, but he had no clue whether their home survived the raging fires. On Tuesday afternoon, Kyle called his parents and shared that his home had miraculously survived the firestorm.

The fires destroyed 11 homes across the valley from where Kyle lived. The home just below him was untouched by the flames and his home on the other side of the valley had been miraculously spared. However, there was some sad news to share with Archie. Kyle told his dad that his 150 avocado trees were burned by the fires. Archie had planted this grove over 30 years ago. The potting shed was destroyed and the irrigation system that watered the delicate green fruit was in unknown repair.

Archie shared the story that he used this avocado farm to teach his kids respect and responsibility for the value of work. Many years ago while raising his children, Saturday mornings were not a time for sleeping in but this dad had his kids working the land and caring for those delicate trees.

Archie breathed a sign of relief and offered a prayer of thanks to God that the home of his children and grandchildren’s was spared. The devastation had stopped within 100 yards from the family homestead. But Archie wondered: What was God thinking burning his precious fruit? One must realize and know down deep in their inner selves that good will come from our afflictions- and further God has allowed this affliction to come.

Once a man completely dejected by his afflictions was walking one day in one of the botanical gardens of Oxford. He noticed this really pretty pomegranate tree. It had a stem which was cut almost through! He asked - what has happened? The gardener replied with an answer which explained the wounds of this man's troubled spirit. "This tree used to shoot so strongly that it bore nothing but leaves. I therefore had to cut it in this manner. Now, when it is almost cut through it has begun to bear plenty of fruit."

Fires in southern California are a matter of fact to families living in that wilderness. God asks us to accept our troubled spirits from fires or disease with the grace and power of the Holy Spirit to endure and see how God can use it. This is, indeed, a hard saying! Some of the words of Jesus speak of how God uses hardship to grow our faith. Scripture speaks regarding God saving us out of afflictions; upholding people in affliction; being a refuge for those afflicted by life.

Despite the apparent destruction of those avocado trees, nature can be very resilient. Kyle promised his dad that he would check that irrigation system to see if it could be salvaged. Maybe, the trees themselves would stage a come back. Only time and the saving grace of God would tell the final outcome.

God prayers for us as we reflect: “I will be glad and rejoice in your love, for you saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul. (Psalm 31:7).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends whose lifetime of work appears to have gone up in smoke. Give us faith and courage in times of affliction to persevere in our firestorms and believe that good will come from the bad. May the ashes that cover the soil reach deep into the roots of those avocados to restore their vigor and bring forth the miracle of fresh fruit to revive this dad’s troubled spirit.

Apolcalypse

Last Monday morning, October 22nd, 910,000 people in San Diego County received a “reverse 911 call”-mandating families to evacuate their homes. In the next 72 hours, 400,000 acres would burn in eight separate fires. At 5am that morning, I was in the center of that firestorm visiting a Marine family. Dad had reported at 5am to his unit at Camp Pendleton. He awaited orders to return home to be with his wife and child. At 6am, I was carrying cases of water and packing the SUV with the “essentials.” I loaded the trunk with baby food, diapers, flashlights, batteries, a few wedding photos, the baby and the family dog.

Despite the imminent danger, this Marine spouse would not leave her apartment complex without her best friend; She ran upstairs and pounded on the door until her girlfriend awoke. She was told you got five minutes to pack and we got to go. In less than three, her groggy friend piled the truck with more clothes, more wedding pictures and her family dog. We then hit the road with two Marine wives, a 7-month-old baby, two dogs and the chaplain holding a shivering old dog on his lap who was wetting my jeans—most likely nerves.

Traffic was bumper to bumper on Route 5 heading away from the fires. As we inched our way to safety, the sky literally changed before our eyes into a yellow haze of thick smoke and ash. This was called the Witch Fire that started in a canyon that the local Native Americans referred to as “bewitched.” The fierce Santa Ana winds were gusting over 60 miles per hour and making this monster firestorm impossible to contain.

I was having memories of driving into downtown Manhattan the day after 9/11. I still have images of that sickening haze of yellow and grey that filled the sky in which you could not see the skyscrapers. As we drove, we could no longer see the mountains nor homes from the side of the road. We could only smell the smoke and literally see the ash fall on our windshield.

Evacuation centers were being set up all over the county including Qualcomm Stadium, where the San Diego Chargers football team plays. This site would become a portal of safety for some 10,000 evacuees. The people of San Diego were at their best donating blankets, sandwiches, sunscreen, Q-tips, toothpaste and dog food. Another 20,000 volunteers came to handout food and offer support.

Firefighters don’t get in front of these monster fires for they know they cannot be stopped. Only four years ago, San Diego battled the Cedar Fire, which was the largest fire in the state’s history. This Firestorm of 2007 would lead to the largest evacuation some 900,000 people in American history and result in the destruction of over 2,000 homes and businesses.

One never knows where God wants us to serve. We need simply to be open to the present moment and allow the Spirit of compassion to direct our actions. Our efforts might reflect the heroism of those 13,000 firefighters, or the generosity of the thousands of donors and volunteers who came to the shelters to offer comfort, or a lap to hold a frighten dog. I continue to serve as a consultant and mentor to the critical incident counselors who are being deployed today into local schools and businesses.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: "I will build a house for you. Therefore your servant now finds the courage to make this prayer to you.” (2 Samuel 7:27).

Lord, I pray for the thousands of firefighters who risked their lives to protect families from the firestorm. Bless the volunteers who fed, sheltered and comforted many wounded souls and watered all your creatures great and small. Note, my Marine families did not lose their homes to the fire. They invited other Marine families whose homes were damaged to stay at their homes for safety. I learned last evening that these same Marines were informed on Friday that they are being deployed to Iraq in January 2008.

Steaking Windows

In helping patients cope with their excessive angry moods, I might suggest methods to redirect their anxiety into more positive activities. Anything aerobic is a remedy, but I think I stumbled about a more innovative solution. I will recommend to all my patients to “wash windows.” I had volunteered to wash an old home with its 30-year-old pane glass and screens. This household task was a lesson in humility.

Many years ago while visiting patients in the hospital, I met a man who told me that he was a professional window washer. His secret for getting windows bright and clean was “dirty water.” I thought he was teasing but he explained that the grime that came off the windows as you washed them served a useful purpose. The grit that accumulated on the window over time served like a mini-scouring pad to clean the windows even better. The dirt actually helped to make the windows bright and clean.

Despite this tip, the job of eliminating the streaks on these windows was exasperating. The sun does not lie and as it shined through the dining room window. I would always find another streak that I had missed. I took down that window at least a dozen times before it passed the test. I began to rethink that this household task might either cure "rage-a-holics" or worse, make one raging insane. In the process of cleaning these old windowpanes, I discovered that in addition to “dirty water” a stronger solution of ammonia would help to eliminate any streaks.

There are situations in life we keep making the same mistakes. The same habits plagued our personality despite our promises to change. In the process, we drive ourselves nuts trying to rub out the streaks of pride, greed and selfishness. We promise to exercise, eat healthier or let go of our addiction to a variety of grimy behaviors that keep us from being a responsible and caring person. Honestly, there is a lot of grime in our buckets of life that has accumulated throughout the years. We may want to dump our bucket of grime down the sink, but the Lord has a different solution. Simply put, He wants us to add His life and spirit into the mix. As I added more ammonia into the solution to help eliminate those annoying streaks, God wants us to add more time for Him to get rid of the streaks that prevent us from shining with His love.

After I had washed those windows, I had noticed on the following day that one small pane had some smudges on it. What gives! It turned out that the family cat had jumped up on the window sill to admire the squirrels on the trees and in her excitement rubbed her nose on the window pane. Maybe, we need to rub noses with our Lord more often to admire His goodness and help us to let go of the grease and grim that clogs our lives.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “From you let my vindication come; your eyes see what is right.” (Psalm 17:2). The New American Bible

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who deny that the windows of their life need a good scrubbing. We can barely see through the panes of glass that are filled with the grime and grit of life. Help us to add your grace into our solution so that we humbly shine bright in your presence.

Crud in Your Pipes

The title of the seminar was “An Ounce of Prevention.” I had been asked to facilitate a workshop on health screening tests for blood pressure, cholesterol, cancer, diabetes and an assortment of health conditions. I turned to a long-time Sonshine geriatric doctor for his wisdom; His input was simple, yet quite profound. He said: “Sometimes we say that life is unfair. The unfairness is about our genetics.”

In taking a medical history, your doctor will ask you whether your parents and siblings suffered from any medical condition like heart disease or cancer. If you have a medical condition in your family history, then you be crazy not to get a regular health screening for that disease. The earlier any disease is detected, the more your health care provider can help you stay healthy.

Now, I wonder what a spiritual screening test would show up on your chart. A mass of crankiness, resentment, jealousy or worse the need for revenge. In preparing for any medical tests, we are asked to put on a paper gown and sit on the cold gurney waiting for the technicians to perform their tests. Regretfully, most women are quite familiar with the discomfort of certain tests. My recommendation, find a tech who knows what they are doing to make this experience more comfortable.

We are told that God will examine our lives at the end of time. Instead of dreading this final exam, and the outcome of His tests. Now might be a good time to get back into spiritual shape and workout those areas of our lives that need a reconditioning. In taking care of our heart, we might think of it as a pump with lots of pipes. If we put to much pressure on the pump or pipes, something might blow.

Where are you suffering spiritual pressure? This might be a time to find a good tech, or spiritual director to help you examine your spiritual health with the goal of cleaning out your pipes so that the grace of God’s mercy might flow more smoothly in your veins.

God prays for us as we reflect: " Behold, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security.” (Jeremiah 33:6).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends whose pipes are filled with memories of crud that block Your healing. Help us to find a spiritual director, a good tech whose is gentle and understanding and inspires us to better spiritual health.

Leading Me On

“I took my ring off my finger and told her I would NEVER put it back on again.” This angry husband felt a premonition months ago, that something was wrong with his marriage. He looked straight into his partner’s eyes on Sunday morning and shared his suspicions when she began to tear up and then he discovered the truth.

He experienced the normal trauma reactions: disbelief, shock, sadness, anger, and confusion. Somehow, he knew deep inside that he had been preparing for this awful moment. For years, he ignored his wife’s invitation to come with the family to church. The usual stubborn excuses prevailed such as: business, fatigue, and other important secular matters. However, “something began to gnaw” inside his gut. Something was leading him on to come back to the Lord. A maelstrom was brewing inside his home and he better find safety in the house of God.

He attended a Men’s Group at his church and an elder gave a witness talk from this scripture: “There is an appointed time for everything; and a time for every affair under the heavens. …a time to die… a time to mourn…and a time to heal…” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4). Our poor soul felt that his marriage was dead. Surely, the old marriage was in tatters, but the grace of God works miracles and can help any couple be reborn from the ashes of despair and resentment. At the moment, he was drowning in his anger and “how dare she” betray the vows of the altar.” His rage only made him feel more helpless and vulnerable which evolved further into silly, self-righteous platitudes.

God’s healing salve entered this man’s heart when I reminded him of the story of the Magdalene. How did she feel when she looked into the eyes of our Lord? Looking into Jesus’ eyes, she felt no shame but only mercy. She found only peace and forgiveness which empowered her soul through God’s saving grace.

I gave this tortured soul an assignment or more like a prescription. I simple asked him that the next time he looked into the eyes of his tearful beloved, what would she see? The Lord’s merciful eyes or the vengeful glare of her accuser. There was only silence as he left the office. I believe God is leading them on to brave the storm and rise above the ashes of shame and despair.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “Have mercy on me, God, in your goodness; in your abundant compassion blot out my offense.” (Psalm 51:3). The New American Bible

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who know when they have been betrayed and lose trust in their beloved. In our emptiness and rage, save us from our desire for pity and revenge. Pour your healing salve that helps us to forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Stuck in the Mud

Did you ever have one of those days in which you feel “stuck in the mud.” Jeremiah had a moment in which he was thrown into the cistern and feared for his life as he sank into a pool of mud.

There are times when our faith gets us in trouble with family and friends. We have mud on our faces because we believe its better to “love our enemies” or “turn the other cheek” or “make peace and not war.” Our Lord had his own troubles with his in-laws and friends who abandoned him in the end and left him to be stuck on a cross. His radical message set him sat at odds with the religious leaders and popular culture of his day.

When we allow a car to cut in front of us on the highway, instead of a curse we might pray for them when they are in such a hurry. When people throw mud in our faces because of our values on life for the unborn or peace in the world, we might pray for the safety of our soldiers and the children.

Being stuck in the mud might be the result of a bad psychological fall or relapse into an old addiction that has come back to life to haunt us. At times like these we need to surrender our need to control the situation and pray to God to help us again get out of the mud of misery and self-pity and start the road back to recovery. God wants us to be successful but the road is filled with lots of potholes and mud along the way.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “I waited, waited for the Lord;, who bent down and heard my cry. He drew me out of the pit of destruction, out of the mud of the swamp, Set my feet upon rock, steadied my steps.” (Psalm 40:2-3).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are stuck in their old patterns that make us unhealthy and mean. We put ourselves at risk for more pain and suffering. Give us the courage and grace to surrender the need for control and help us out of our cesspool of pride and resentment.

We Are All Worth the Search

We are all worth the search. We are all worth finding. The God we pray to wants us to know that no matter how far we have roamed, no matter how bad we have been, no matter what we have done, if we repent and promise to change our lives, then we will be found, we will be forgiven.

But guess what? Being found doesn't just happen. Sometimes Christ needs to work through us to bring others back to his flock.

In my ministry as a hospital chaplain, I remember a nurse sharing a story about a patient who had been admitted with a heart attack, and he had seemed restless and anxious all evening. After checking his chart, she asked how he was feeling. With tears in his eyes, he asked her if she would call his daughter and tell her of his heart attack. She was the only family he had left, and he seemed very anxious that she know of his condition. The nurse promised to call right away.

When the nurse reached the patient’s daughter with news of her father's heart attack, she was startled by the woman's reaction. The woman screamed, "No!" She blurted out that she and her father hadn't communicated in years. He had abandoned the family when she was a child and raised by her mother. All this time, she had struggled with forgiveness.

The nurse began to pray. If only God would allow this estranged father and his daughter to reconcile! She felt an urgent need to return to his room and found him unconscious, suffering from another heart attack. She performed CPR on his lifeless form, she sent up a desperate prayer to God that he wouldn't die before he found peace with his daughter. But no amount of medical attention would re-start his heart. He was dead.

In the hallway of the hospital, the nurse saw a young woman with shock and grief on her face. It was the daughter. The nurse tried to comfort her. "I never hated him, you know. I loved him," the young woman said. The daughter wanted to see her father. As the daughter leaned over the body of her dead father and cried, the nurse glanced around the room. She picked up a piece of paper and glanced at the name on top, and handed it to the daughter. The young woman read it aloud: "My dearest, I pray you will forgive me. I know that you love me. I love you too. Daddy." Where grief and shock had contorted the daughter’s features and filled her eyes, now there was only peace. The nurse slipped out of the room and headed to a telephone, to call her own father.

We need to ask ourselves "who needs forgiveness in our own lives"? How much anger may be consuming our lives, the very same anger which once consumed the life of the daughter? We need to use this time to forgive our friends, our family, our neighbors, and maybe even ourselves. Christ needs us to find the lost and bring them back. Only then will there be great rejoicing in heaven.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that we may never doubt Your love nor take for granted the mercy You have shown to us. Fill us with your transforming love that we may be merciful as you are merciful.

Driving Into the Storm

I have just returned from another 9/11 incident providing critical incident services to over 500 employees who witnessed the death of a co-worker.

On 9/11 while buildings fell, lives were lost, I remember praying with passengers in the terminal at JFK because for some God was found.

There is no doubt that this date will stand forever in the corridors of time, but as I ministered to hundreds of workers who were shocked to learn that their colleague had died, the spirit of compassion was quietly working her way into the hearts of those employees to reach out to save others who were going through 9/11 experiences.

I believe we must continue to let the Holy Spirit minister to us in the areas of our fog and the darkness of our unbelief. While employees were in shock and disbelief, I heard many stories of suffering. The nephew gunned down on a city street only two weeks ago. An employee’s brother shot and killed over the weekend. A manager grief for his 16-year son who had died of cancer. A young man slumped at his desk at 11 o’clock at night who had just returned from the hospital where his father was on life support.

Then there was the woman diagnosed with cancer in May but she was in remission. Now, she wanted to help others and tell her story of survival and help others face their fear and despair with her courage and hope. The EMT who ran to the side of that employee had just graduated from her safety course was receiving emails from other EMT employees who offered to put together an emergency response team into their workplace. I believe the Holy Spirit was on fire with compassion in this call center in the past 48 hours healing during this traumatic moment.

Yet, in our 9/11 moments of daily life, we might be thinking: Why is this happening to me? or I just can’t handle this any longer, or God, where are you, I desperately need you? or Where was God on September 11?

There are many stories of suffering in the Scriptures for a reason. Through them, we can gain a glimmer of insight into dealing with our own sufferings. What can we learn about their sorrows and about our own? Through the storms of life and through any difficult situation let us learn that: some saints learn to hate, some saints learn to wonder and some saints learn to wait. I wonder where you might find yourself in these three statements?

Where was God September 11, 2001? Where was God in the past 48 hours? Yes, God is with you right now....where you are!! Now, that might not change the situation, but I know personally, that it changes my attitude toward any difficulty....the lost.....the job situation.....the marriage.....the relationship.....the raising of a difficult child....the lack of strength.....you name your critical incident…your trauma.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “Even though I walk through a dark valley, I fear no harm for you are at my side; your rod and your staff give me courage.” (Psalm 23:4).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who desperately need you now! You are aware of the trauma we face at this very moment. In fact I believe that You are thinking about us right now. I pray you bring comfort and peace in a very special way from your keyboard in heaven to theirs. Assure them that they are not alone and assure them of your love in the situation. Please grant your peace and may their soul be calm through the storms of life.

Comfortable In Your Own Skin

I have a Sonshine friend who uses a wheelchair for mobility. She wondered why Jesus only healed a few people in the Bible, why not everyone? Her prayer life is rich, but sometimes she gets turned her off to her religion, as she wondered why after much prayer she herself was not healed. But then she has grown to learn that healing comes in many ways.

Maybe her healing was letting go of the hurt, the resentment, the not accepting her situation of the wheelchair and allowing the healing peace of Christ to enter her live. After she did that, she came to realize that the stories of Jesus were more than a few miracles for a few people, but a way of life, a relationship with Christ that daily allows her to accept and to be free and “comfortable in her own skin."

Sometimes she wishes she could wake up in the morning without the help of her home care aide and get dressed in no certain order. For with wearing leg braces, she had to put her socks on first, then her leg brace, then lace up all the straps on the brace, pull her pants over the leg brace, etc. A very tedious affair.

But in her dream, she would run out of the room with one shoe on, one shoe off down the stairs without hanging onto the rail, outside, skipping and hoping trying to get the other shoe on. She would run as fast as she could and let the breeze flow through her hair. She would jump as high as she could just to feel what it was like to be off the ground. She wished for what the rest of us often take for granted.

All of us at one point or another wish to be free from something. We pray, we beg, we try any thing, but then reality sinks in and we know our wish will be answered. Healing comes in many forms, and it just might be the ability to live with the reality of life and then to be comfortable in our own skins.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “But the needy will never be forgotten, nor will the hope of the afflicted ever fade.” (Psalm 9:19)

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are afraid to face their limitations or go into shock when the doctor tells us that we must walk with a brace. May your healing give us the strength to be comfortable in our own skins.

Across the Finish Line

A Sonshine Friend retired after a distinguished vocation, as a college professor. He felt his calling to teach was a gift from the Lord. One unfinished task that troubled his soul was a student who had for years procrastinated to get her dissertation completed. She would not graduate. He had given her numerous extensions to complete her assignment, but each time she failed to meet the deadline. She was running out of time, since the college informed her that her privileges as a matriculating student were about to be suspended. So, he called upon her once again and encouraged her to complete her final requirement.

There were more delays, but he received a surprise on the 28th of the month with only 3 days left before the final deadline. It was the dissertation that she needed to complete. He quickly edited her work that very same day and asked her to simply follow his instructions to make the necessary corrections so that she could graduate in the summer. In reviewing her final work, he judged her thesis on the basis that for this student “this was the best work that she could do.”

What a marvelous and profound statement to make about a person. Here is a professor who knows his students. He never gave up on her. Throughout her tenure as a student, he kept encouraging her to preserve despite the obstacles that plagued her life. She was victim to the many illnesses, family problems and stresses that bog us down from keeping our sights focused on the important goals in life.

Another teacher might have simply laid out the policy, stated the deadline and failed her. There are standards that all students have to accept and if circumstances prevent us from completing our assignments then perhaps we were not met to be a teacher, a nurse or a priest.

However, I believe this kind-hearted teacher knew his student, as the Lord knows each of us. This professor wanted her to succeed and graduate. In the same light, God wants us to succeed and gain eternal life. This compassionate professor understood her limitations and instead of failing her or giving up, he could not help himself but firmly kept encouraging her to stay the course. When threatened to lose her status as a matriculating student, he admitted his tactics became firmer with the urgency to complete the dissertation. To his delight, he made his corrections and knew this final work was “the best that she could be.”

I believe that Lord sees us in exactly this same light. With our weaknesses and excesses, he sees that our efforts often do not measure up to the standards we are called upon to practice. We were not married in the “correct form” or our children “came before the wedding” or our faith tradition does not conform to “salvation dogma." Despite these shortcomings, I believe God’s sees only the good in our hearts. Like my dear professor who kept encouraging his student to “do her best.” God knows we are capable of great acts of charity and mercy.

The Lord prays for us as we reflect: “You give me your shield of victory, and your right hand sustains me; you stoop down to make me great.” (Psalm 18:35).

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine friends who are faced with decisions where they have procrastinated because of weakness. We have put off decisions to quit smoking, or drinking or taking those non-prescribed drugs to ease our emotional pain. Give us your Spirit to know what is “our best” and surrender any desire to control the outcome. Sometimes the best thing we can do when we fall short of our goals is to let God carry us across the finish line.