Whoever said sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me didn't know much about gossip, did they?
Truth matters because anything less than the truth eventually leads to pain for someone. The people of Israel loved to murmur, and they loved to complain, especially about Moses. They even complained about God. And all kinds of people loved to gossip and murmur against Jesus, just like in today's gospel. The truth is a powerful thing. In fact, our whole society depends on it. Every relationship you have business, marriage, church community, friendship depends on truthfulness, doesn't it? When we don't tell the truth about other people, when we gossip, stick our noses into areas where they don't belong because of a desire to be in the know, when we slander, intentionally set out to hurt somebody with our words, bad things happen. Marriages crumble, deals fall apart, relationships sour, friendships end, parishes are divided and sometimes lives are destroyed.
The tongue is a dangerous weapon, it's a powerful tool, and there are no tongue control laws. The tongue is remarkable. It can destroy thousands of lives without shedding an ounce of blood. Most of us don't think of ourselves as murderers, do we? But we murder people's reputations when we gossip, or when we stand by and let somebody else assassinate a person's character. Gossip can never be undone. Some people will never look the same way at that person again. It's evil. Gossip is the invisible sin, and tragically now gossip is just another name for conversation. Social media has made murmuring normal. In fact, it's made it accepted, encouraged, and not even noticed. But you and I are called to be the people of truth. Honesty is not the best policy. Honesty is a way of life. People of God deal honestly with other people. We live the truth. We shouldn't look like the world.
Words have the power to heal, to give hope, to encourage. So here's three simple questions to ask yourself before you speak.
Number one, is this true? Take this seriously. Before you say something, ask yourself is it true. If you don't know that what you say is true, stop. How much grief could have been avoided if someone had merely asked themselves the question, "Do I know that this is true?"
Second, is this necessary? Sometimes there's no denying the facts, but it's just not helpful to broadcast them or to have other people take pleasure in the shame of somebody else. There are times to remain silent. And the best way to prevent gossip is to ask yourself, "Is it really necessary to say this? Does this person really need to know?" And if the answer's no, stop.
Third, is this charitable? Slander means to intentionally use words to hurt someone. And slander is easily prevented by this question. Will these words bring hope or healing?
Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who been hurt by gossip. You and I are called to stand for the truth. We are called to stand out for the truth, to speak the truth, to use words to help, not to hurt. We are called to be a people of truth.
