BEHIND THE LEGEND:JAVA CHURCH PLANS A VISIT FROM THE 'REAL' St NICK

By JESSICA DILLON
JDILLON@BATAVIANEWS.COM

PUBLISHED: THURSDAY, DECEMBER 7, 2017 AT 5:15 AM

NORTH JAVA — St. Nicholas will not bring gifts to the children this Sunday. Instead, the children will bring gifts to him. At Holy Family National Polish Catholic Church in North Java, it’s nothing more, and nothing less, than a holiday tradition.

The parish was reborn out of the former St. Nicholas Catholic Church, closed by the Diocese of Buffalo 10 years ago. There, the feast of St. Nicholas had always been a cause for celebration. The initial closure, and then reopening, and reopening of the church five years later, hasn’t changed that.

“Once again, the children will come with their toys, and once again, St. Nicholas will share his story,” said Rev. Matt Kawiak.

Though the real St. Nick passed away in the fourth century, his legacy lives on — most popularly in the stories of a magical, gift-giving Santa Claus who comes down chimneys to deliver presents on Christmas Eve.

In the Catholic tradition, though, St. Nicholas is the patron saint of children and numerous other causes — he is known colloquially as “everyone’s saint.”

The legend of Santa Claus grew out of the stories told about him — he supposedly threw bags of gold through windows to help pay the dowries of a poor man’s daughters and used his entire inheritance to spread goodness throughout the world. So at Holy Family, the gifts that the children bring — some are gently used, some are brand new — are gathered and then distributed by Angel Action to children in need.

“I believe this annual celebration of St. Nicholas inviting children to bring gifts is God’s way of reminding these children of what Christmas is all about,” Kawiak said. “The spirit of Christmas is not about how much they are going to get or whose feelings would be hurt if they don’t give something of value.

“Here, these children are learning that what’s special about Christmas is not their concerns about what they are going to get for Christmas,” he continued. “Rather, their only concern is about giving something special to another child who would have no presents to open on Christmas.”

That’s something Ben Kibler, a local parishioner, gets to experience firsthand. He serves each year as the man, the myth, the legend, donning white robes and a curly-haired wig and beard, sharing with children the story of St. Nicholas and his historical good deeds.

“I have to admit I’m pretty excited this year more than others,” Kibler said, referencing the fact that his first child, Patrick, was born just over a month ago.

“It just opens my eyes, I guess, to see how he’s going to react and what it means to him. I went to the same church as a little kid and I know what it always meant to me...”

And so, while he eagerly anticipates how his own child will embrace the stories of God and His love, especially during the Christmas season, he gets to witness other young children celebrate the true meaning of the holiday.

“It’s awesome,” Kibler said. “It’s a little different now because — I mean, five years ago, the kids who started doing this are now young adults ... To see their little brothers and sisters come up, that’s what I like best, just seeing the new faces.”

He’s not alone.

“I think that having the St. Nicholas celebration is really special,” said Molly Haungs, a four-year religious education teacher at the parish. “I think it’s a unique concept to bring a gift to St. Nick instead of St. Nick bringing a gift to them.”

Haungs, the mother of a 3-year-old and a 3-week-old, hopes that this celebration, and all that it symbolizes, will one day help to instill good Christian values in her own children as well.

“I think the idea that we’re teaching these little kids that Christmas is not just about getting, it’s about giving, is great,” Haungs said. “My kids, they’re still young, but I hope that’s something they learn at a young age.”

Just last week, she devoted an entire class to teaching parish children to be thankful for all that they receive and experience during the holiday season.

“Our lesson focused on teaching the children that whenever we receive presents or any of the other amazing, magical things during Christmas time, we just take a second and thank God for giving us his son, which is the reason for the season.”

She said that the celebration is one that helps her, too, to step back from the chaos and “bah humbugs” to truly embrace the meaning of the holiday.

“Looking at the kids who understand the season and understand that they’re so blessed to have what they have is amazing,” Haungs said. “It’s so easy with how busy we all are to get stressed and bogged down, but when you see Christmas through the eyes of the kids who understand the reason for the season, it’s so much more profound and meaningful and special.”

The celebration will take place Sunday at Holy Family Parish, 4316 Route 98, North Java, at 10 a.m. All are encouraged, but not required, to bring a gift. The service is open to everyone.

“Let me extend a special invitation to all parents to bring their children and grandchildren to meet St. Nicholas and truly celebrate the spirit and joy of the season,” Kawiak said. “I am very humbled by the generosity and compassion of this faith community. Our children inspire of all us to share of gifts not only at Christmas but every day throughout the year.”

Hang In There

If you were in church this weekend, you might notice that things were different. The sanctuary was bare except the Advent wreath was present and one candle was lit. This signals the beginning of a new church year and our faith community started with an old fashioned Advent Penance Service.

Now this isn’t a moment to get upset how you go about confession, or worse, worry that the last time you made your last penance was decades ago. Rather, let me point out a heathy way to embrace this sacrament of peace.

There’s an article that points out the need to “keep on keeping on.” We fret about confessing our sins because it’s always the same old things that keep us from being the best person we can be, or what we use to say  “in the state of grace.”

Are you in a situation where it appears to be the "same old, same old"?
"Did you ever notice," said an old lady, smiling into the troubled face before her, "that when the Lord told the discouraged fishermen to cast their nets again it was right in that same old place where they had been working all night, and had caught nothing?"

If we could only go off to some new place every time we get discouraged, trying again would be an easier thing. If we could be somebody else, or go somewhere else, or do something else, it might not be hard to have fresh faith and courage; but it is the same old net in the same old pond for most of us.

The old faults to be conquered, the old trials and discouragements before us.
If we are going to change “where we are” then we have humbly put ourselves in the hands of the Lord despite our past failures and “try again.”

God is present to us in joyful times and in times of despair and frustrations: as we reflect and pray: "As you know, we consider blessed those who have persevered." James 5:11.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that as we start another new church year and Advent Season you bless this one to "hang in there" and to know that you are with them. We are where we are at this moment. May this one make the best of it without complaining in the name of Jesus.

Our Passport to Heaven

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We need to give away some of our own possessions in order to be healthy. Wealth that is hoarded always corrupts those who possess it. Any gift that is not shared turns sour. If we are not generous with our gifts we will be bitterly envied and will eventually turn bitter and envious ourselves.

These are all axioms with the same warning, we can only be healthy if we are giving away some of our riches to others. Among other things, this should remind us that we need to give to the poor, not simply because they need it, though they do, but because unless we give to the poor we cannot be healthy ourselves. When we give to the poor both charity and justice are served, but some healthy self-interest is served as well, namely, we cannot be healthy or happy unless we share our riches, of every kind, with the poor. That truth is written inside human experience and inside every authentic ethical and faith tradition.

In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus warns us that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of Heaven, nevertheless praises the rich who are generous, condemning only the rich who are stingy. For Luke, generosity is the key to health and heaven.

In the Gospel of Matthew, when Jesus reveals what will be great test for the final judgment, his single set of criteria have entirely to do with how we gave to the poor: Did you feed the hungry? Give drink to the thirsty? Cloth the naked? Finally, even more strongly, in the story of the widow who gives her last two pennies away, Jesus challenges us to not only give of our surplus to the poor, but to also give away some of what we need to live on.  The Gospels, and the rest of the Christian scriptures, strongly challenge us to give to the poor.

On Black Friday, while people were online buying gifts for their loved one. I received a letter from a daughter whose dad had died this Fall. To show her appreciation, her family donated FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS ($5,000) to the Charlotte Comfort Home ministry, the future hospice for Wyoming County that will be located in Holy Family’s former rectory.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends, that we continue to give some of our possessions away in order to be healthy. The poor do need us, but we also need them. They are, as Jesus puts it so clearly when he tells us we will be judged by how we gave to the poor, our passports to heaven. And they are also our passports to health. Our health depends upon sharing our riches.

Don't Let Go

There is a Norwegian proverb that reads: Heroism consists of hanging on one minute longer.

The story is about a young boy who had fallen through the ice while skating and was left clinging, cold and alone, to the edge of the ice with no help in sight. As he hung on in this seemingly hopeless situation he was tempted many times to simply let go since no one was going to come along to rescue him. But he held on, despite all odds. Finally, when everything seemed beyond hope, he clung on one minute longer and after that extra minute help arrived.

The story was simple and its moral was simple: This young boy lived because he had the courage and strength to hang on one minute longer. Rescue comes just after you have given up on it, so extend your courage and wait one minute longer.

St. Paul preached: You must never grow weary of doing what is right (2 Thes 3:13). And in his letter to the Galatians, Paul virtually repeats the Norwegian proverb: “Let us not become weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up (Gal 6:9).

This sounds so simple and yet it cuts to the heart of many of our moral struggles. We give up too soon.

All of us experience tension in our lives: tension in our families, tension in our friendships, tension in our places of work, tension in our churches, tension in our communities, and tension within our conversations with other people, politics, and current events. Good-hearted people carry that tension with patience, respect, graciousness, and tolerance—for a while! Then, at a certain point when we feel stretched to our limit, we grow weary of doing what is right, feel something snap inside, and hear some inner-voice say: Enough! I’ve put up with this too long! I won’t tolerate this anymore! And we let go, unlike the little boy clinging to the ice and waiting for rescue. We let go of patience, respect, graciousness, and tolerance, either by venting our frustrations, giving a piece of our mind or simply flee the situation with an attitude of good riddance. We refuse to carry the tension any longer.

Of course, carrying tension is never easy. But, if you persevere and never grown weary of doing what is right, at your funeral, those who knew you will be blessed and grateful that you continued to believe in them even when for a time they had stopped believing in themselves.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that we have to courage to hang on when tension stretches us to our limits and persevere with patience, respect, graciousness, and tolerance.

Saint=Horse

There’s a Jewish folk-tale which runs something like this: There once was a young man who aspired to great holiness. After some time at working to achieve it, he went to see his Rabbi.

I think I have achieved sanctity. I’ve been practicing virtue and discipline for some time now and I have grown quite proficient at them. From the time, the sun rises until it sets, I take no food or water. All day long, I do all l do all kinds of hard work for others and I never expect to be thanked. If I have temptations of the flesh, I roll in the snow or in thorn bushes until they go away, and then at night, before bed, I practice the ancient monastic discipline and administer lashes to my bare back. I have disciplined myself so as to become holy.

The Rabbi was silent for a time. Then he took the young man by the arm and led him to a window and pointed to an old horse which was just being led away by its master.

I have been observing that horse for some time and I’ve noticed that it doesn’t get fed or watered from morning to night. All day long it has to do work for people and it never gets thanked. I often see it rolling around in snow or in bushes, as horses are prone to do, and frequently I see it get whipped. I ask you: Is that a saint or a horse?

This is a good parable because it shows how simplistic it is to simply identity sanctity and virtue with self-renunciation and the capacity to do what’s difficult. In popular thought, there’s a common spiritual equation: saint=horse. What’s more difficult is always better. But that can be wrong.

To be a saint is to be motivated by gratitude, nothing more and nothing less. Scripture, everywhere and always, makes this point.

For example, our bishop needed surgery that he knew he had only a 11% chance of survival. When I visited him in the hospital last Sunday, he joked that when the doctors look into his brain they won’t find anything. This bishop has a wonderful sense of humor and he appreciates all the love of his family and friends. Every time a nurse came into his room for a procedure, he thanked her.

Today, he is recovering from the surgery and once again he winked at me and said I was right, “they looked inside and couldn’t find a thing.” His sister as at his bedside said that he had been naughty trying to pull out all the tubes. Now he wears mittens to keep his hands and the tubes safe.

This humble bishop needs your prayers since the doctors found cancer and they are waiting the biopsy results to see what treatment will help this humble saint get better.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends in thanksgiving for sharing their gifts of time and talent to make your love, compassion and mercy presence. Bless them all with your grace of healing, strength and gratitude.

The Real Meaning of Halloween

Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and a witch walking down the aisle with the processional cross. In tow, our kids from the parish dressed as pirates, princess, skeleton and lady liberty. Pumpkins in the sanctuary and lots of smiles introduced Holy Family’s celebration of All Saints Day.

Beyond dressing up and gorging on candy, there’s a deeper spiritual meaning that underlies this holyday. As the witch with her wonderful black brim hat stepped up to the lectern she invited the children to pray: “God wants everyone to be a saint.”

She told stories about St Paul, St Peter, and Saint Mother Teresa and the children in chorus shouted: God wants us to be a saint.”

On a side table, our liturgy artists designed a table with pumpkins and leaves and invited our parishioners to bring photos of their loved ones to remember and pray in gratitude for their lives.

Our little witch proclaimed: “These people on our Remembrance Table are fathers and mothers, grandfathers and grandmothers, brothers and sisters who prayed and worked and served Jesus in our homes. We miss them all very much. They were special people who taught us how to love Jesus. Bless them with happiness in heaven and may we always be grateful for their love and kindness to each of us. And the children shouted: “God wants us to be saints.”

Finally, she read, “My name is Maddie. I probably won‘t ever walk on water or get captured by pirates while preaching. But God is helping me be a saint too. I am just an ordinary person doing ordinary things. I wake up every morning and pray to do my best for God. I like to laugh and sing and work. Sometimes I get mad and sometimes I cry but God loves me anyway and wants me to be a saint too.

During the Kiss of Peace, our little saints were invited to walk around the church and share the love of Jesus with hugs and high fives. But most profound was at the end of our celebration, we asked all our grownups to kneel and instructed our children to place their hands over the heads of their parents and neighbors as a blessing and we prayed: “The saints were people like us, weak, with faults like the ones we have; only, they did not take these failings for granted. They led the same lives as we do, only in a more courageous way. We are called to the same holiness to which God called them. May you respond to God’s call with the strength and blessing of the almighty and loving God: the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends whose baskets are ready to treat those who come knocking at their door. May your hearts always be filled with treats and gratitude for the kindness and mercy we have received from the saints we have met on our journey of faith.

What Do I Need to Bury

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Once a woman was jogging down a dirt road that wound through the fields of corn and she stumbled upon an eating disorder clinic that caters to the wealthy. She veered off the trail onto a groomed cider track, which she discovered was a twelve-step trail. Signs with motivational slogans such as “expect a miracle” lined the trail. The trail ended at a cemetery of tiny craved grave markers. She stopped to read each grave.

“Here lies my resentment of people” someone had written on a tombstone. Others buried such things as cigarettes, an obsession with chocolate, diet pills, a lack of self-discipline, the need to control others, a habit of lying, alcohol and marijuana. She thought to herself, what do I need to bury?

If there were one spiritual corpse common to us all, is the attitude that our sins and shortcomings put us beyond the reach and concern of God. This unbiblical attitude is quite common. I contacted a colleague who deals with alcoholics and drug addicts. I asked this question: “Have you found that people who live with failure each day, that backsliding draws them further from God or presses them toward God?”

This retired school counselor who has been attending AA for 35 years said that it pushes people toward God. She shared stories about alcoholics and addicts who have done terrible things to themselves and their families. Yet in those moments of weakness they are the very moments when they are likely to turn to God, to cry out in desperation. They have failed terribly. Now what? Can they get up again and walk again, or do they stay paralyzed? Through the grace of God, some of them do get up. In fact, she decided there is one key in determining whether an individual can reach recovery; if they deeply believe they are a forgivable child of God. Not a failure-free child of God but a forgivable one.

Francis de Sales wrote: “Now the greater our knowledge of our own misery, the more profound will be our confidence in the goodness and mercy of God.”

You see what I’m trying to get across? Our failures, do not separate us from the love of God. Our fondness’ for sin, does not force God to give up on us.

My dear fellow sinners, my dear fellow failures, there is much to be buried in the graveyard of our spiritual disorder clinic. You and I know what moral failures need to be entombed forever. Even though we walk in the dark valley of addiction or violence in our hearts and hands, God is there. With rod and staff, he offers possibilities, hope, and a better future.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends, who believe that the Lord is indeed forever at my side, even in my worst moments. He forever sees not what I have done, but what I can do.

Don't Blame God

On Monday night, I’m staring at my emails with a message looking for volunteers to help in Las Vegas and provide crisis counseling. Without hesitation, I would have forwarded an email to say that I was available but it seemed that the responses from local counselors would meet their need for onsite debriefing. Later that evening their staffing needs were met. However, on Wednesday, I get a urgent request to provide crisis counseling for a local double murder where one adult was shot and the other committed suicide.

I don't know about you, but it makes me impatient with God. How can God allow people to run wild in their violence? Why doesn't God do something? For that matter why doesn't God do something about the violence and suffering of the innocent in our day?

What is behind all this violence in our world? I want to suggest that part of it is a shocking lack of empathy for other people, for victims, an inability to feel what those who are hurt or dying are feeling. We lack empathy and we hurt and kill others because we have divided the world into “us” and “them”—a distinction, mind you, that is high on Jesus’ list of what is horribly and terribly evil in the world.

For Jesus, there is no “us” and “them,” no Hispanic and Mexican, no blacks and whites, no gay and straight, no Roman Catholic and Polish Catholic. Jesus taught that our neighbor is everyone—especially everyone who is hurting. We must understand and appreciate his or her pain. In fact, it is not too-far-fetched to say that empathy for victims is Christianity’s cardinal virtue.

God's word to us today is a word of judgment. Just as surely as Jesus was judging the religious leaders of his day with the parable of the landowner and tenants, he is judging us. We are called to share what we have with others, that’s why in our parish we bid on a cow to make food for the poor, why we are donating bricks to maintain the playground, why we voted to build a hospice for the dying, why we are preparing our raffle baskets for the Spaghetti Dinner, why we invite you and your family to come join us on Sunday, October 22^nd to eat and bid on over a 150 baskets to support our various ministries, because together are producing fruit for God’s kingdom.

Noe when you hear about pain and suffering, the terror in Las Vegas, devastation caused by the hurricanes, an innocent child killed by their parent, don't blame God. And don't respond in anger at God when you see suffering or ask why God permits this and why God doesn't do something. The truth is that God has done something. God came in Jesus Christ to die for our sins and bring new life. And God is doing something in that God has made you and me. We can and are making a difference with God's help.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who have been victims of violence, through abuse, selfishness and greed. Restore our empathy to reach out to anyone who has felt this pain and suffering and let us be a sign of Your comfort and peace.

Why Did You Do That?

A curious thing happened at the county fair this year. Once again, our parish won the bid on a cow to the delight of a 4H student who had won his division. Now his prize would be used to feed many poor families in the county. A person questioned why would the church pay so much money and then give it away. The answer that he was given was profound.

You see the people of this parish have made a choice that when they come to church it not about the buildings, paying the mortgage, or working on a committee. Rather, it’s our opportunity to be another Christ. She shared that all are welcomed in this faith community to learn about the love of the Lord who rejects no one. But our gospel story took her message up another notch.

Once upon a time, a pastor received a note from a family that had become inactive in the church. After listing a series of familiar reasons for their absence, (summer time at the lake, busy weekends with soccer and basketball and vacation trips at Christmas, etc.,) they closed their letter with these words, “But one of these days, don’t be surprised when you look up and see us out there in the congregation, because we just love you, and we just love our church.” “We just love our church;” we just can’t be bothered with showing up and participating in any noticeable way. That is a pretty clear example of saying yes while living no.

Week after week we gather in church and will pray the Lord’s prayer and say, “Forgive us our sins while we forgive those who sin against us.” And yet we go on for years harboring resentments, nursing grudges, withholding grace and forgiveness and reconciliation from others while accepting it for ourselves from God.  Saying yes while living no.

In the parable, it is the Chief Priests and Elders who are accused by Jesus of saying yes while living no. Jesus tells the parable about the two brothers, each of whom was told to go to the vineyard and work.  One says no, but later changes his mind goes to work.  The other says yes, but never shows up at the vineyard. Then Jesus asked the Chief Priests and Elders: “Which of the two did the will of the father?” They say, “The one who went to the field and worked.”

Now, Jesus drives his point home. The tax collectors and prostitutes may have turned their backs on God at one point in their lives, but because they eventually repent and obey and serve God – they are way ahead of the Chief Priests and Elders, who have spent their lives professing their love for God but who have never done any of the works of love and mercy which God asked them to perform.

So, like that person at the county fair who was shocked by the generosity of the parish, we have our excuses for saying no to God. Times when we have resisted the burden of the cross, when we have made it clear that we prefer to go our own way rather than God’s way.

Perhaps we thought it would be easy, but then found out that walking the way of Christ was harder than we thought.  Or perhaps we really, really meant to, but got distracted and waylaid by the troubles and trials of life.  Either way, we all need help, we all need to find a way to say yes and live yes.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who make time to come to church, pray for their family and friends and give a little extra of themselves when least expected.

Just Have Fun

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On a recent pilgrimage to Utah to take photos of national parks, a fellow traveler was sitting next to me during a presentation on travel photography who was feeling a tad overwhelmed. The photo expert was using “photo jargon” that went over his head. This novice really wanted to learn how to take better photos. I don’t why, but I leaned over during the presentation and whispered: “ just have fun.”

Yes, after decades of taking slides, then prints, now pixels I have learned a few tricks of the trade. But I think if you want to develop a passion for any hobby you need to develop a passion for your subject. Landscape photography is my passion.

This fellow traveler surprised me when he invited me to his home in Oakland, California to take a hike into Yosemite National Park. Little did I realize that he has been taking photos for over 50 years and in his retirement after a successful teaching career he wanted to learn how to take better photos.

On a whim, I landed on the west coast and this new friend took me to his favorite “Kodak” moments, my term not his, to share his passion and love for the beauty of God’s creation in national parks.

Note, he’s better than “uber” for his knowledge of the freeways working his way to those scenic vistas was awesome. I’ll never complain about traffic in Rochester or Buffalo again after negotiating 16 lanes of traffic on west coast freeways.

He said “he likes to talk” and his dear spouse agreed. Some of our travels were thirteen hours long and like Garrison Keillor, he shared many fun stories about family, kids, and career as a primary school principal mentoring teachers, students, parents, school boards and all manner of administration.

However, when we got out of the car and reviewed the landscape he got very serious because his goal was to improve his photo skills. My practical advice was: “include some foreground in your images.” It’s nice to take that Golden Gate, or Bridal Falls or El Capitan for the zillionth time, but maybe an interesting foreground that leads your eye would make it a stunning shot.

Jesus was always leading our eyes to a future glory that meant that the journey would fill us with awe and wonder. On the journey of life, he would focus our attention to be the best person we could be. That means we need to include lots more compassion, generosity, forgiveness and kindness in our viewfinder.

My humble thanks to a stranger who has become a treasured friend because he took a chance on inviting this shepherd to his home and take him along to see the wonders of his land. My prayers of gratitude for his time and love for the west coast parklands because he did “wear me out.” Now he’s waiting for me to forward him some of my photos to continue to improve his passion for photography.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends blessed with many gifts and passions to make your beauty and wisdom known. May God bless all your passions and know that you are appreciated for all that you share about your love for horses and kitties, photography and wood turning, fishing, and praying. Remember my mantra: "just have fun."

Tribute to a Wood Craver

Nobody knows why wood carvers are wood cravers. Not even they can tell you why. It’s time somebody try. Carving a wooden bowl going at the rate of 1400 revolutions a per minute is risky and most likely something that Ed looked forward to doing when he came to his workshop.  He was always clever with his hands but in the last decade of his life he became a master in this art. Many of his neighbors came to watch, a few would donate blocks of woods from their farms and woods.  Wood and steel are uncomfortable separately or together. His friends marveled at his passion.

Any day at his workshop, he would start his day by looking over the blocks of spalling maple or cherry, ash or walnut and figure in his head what project he would tackle. Into his work pants, work gloves and protective face guard and out he goes to work. He starts his day, checking out the air-dried wood that had been drying for six months or more, Minutes later he’s fast at work.  As he pondered which block of wood he would craft his next bowl, he reviewed his simple turning tools. Like a surgeon he would sharpen his simple rougher, then his 90-degree detailer, check his simple shear cutting finisher and prepare to put the wood on the chuck.

For some people, this is the scary part as a steel wheel turning at breakneck speed, and you take a gouging tool and start smoothing the outside of the wood into a curved bowl. The woods chips are sailing through the air while you have your air compressor vacuuming up the dust particles from clogging your lungs. Your eyes are straining to see that you are not cutting too much wood and making it too thin and you might lose track of where you are. Is it worth it?

Inside your protective shield, the wood chips are flying everywhere. There’s sawdust down your neck. You got to be careful to place the detailer on the bar so that your fingers don’t get smashed. But you emerge from this holocaust hugging, with your calloused hands, a unique crafted bowl with a burl and detail that reveals the test of time. Wood and steel.

You have worked hours to craft this unique work of art, not concerned about the months you had to wait for the moisture to exit the wood, or the fact that after hours turning a beautiful piece of wood, you discovered a crack that made it impossible to save. You discovered that the learning continues after all those years of making beds and chairs, for this craft requires more skill and understanding. Once you have designed your bowl and unstuffed your nostrils; you can almost breathe again. Next comes the tedious hours of oiling and waxing and sanding your bowl and then re-sharpening your gouges and cleaning your grimy tools. You a one-man cleaning crew at the workshop as the floor needs sweeping and you gather the woodchips usually to put into your veggie garden or given away as compost for some neighbor.

Back at the workshop, you and a neighbor, would sit a spell, tired but stimulated, admiring another piece of your art, or relieved that you had accomplished another repair order, drinking coffee and laughing, and feeling good about one another. Nobody outside your world can ever quite know that feeling of what it means to sit in the quiet of your wood shop. It was like a holy chapel where you met God who had come to bring you peace. There’s no way that you would ever quit this job, and you wonder how did this hobby became your passion. Yet, only God knows why. Perhaps to give you comfort when your beloved spouse died, she was your passion and when she went home to her heavenly reward she gave you this gift to keep your mind and heart occupied.

God took your sorrow and poured it down a drain, that freed you from sadness until you heard a familiar voice of God saying: “For salvaging wood from the fires of a woodstove or people whose wood treasures needed repair, “I have to relied on your hands.”

Forgive Yourself

I have encountered a lot of broken souls in my counseling vocation. Addicts, abusers, runaways, homeless, incarcerated, paroled and more. I’ve spoken with the haunted and angry, as well as the broken and defeated. So many sad and empty eyes that once shined with hope and promise.

If there are any cracks in your protective emotional armor, this mass of tragic humanity can break your heart. So many people carrying huge emotional burdens. They’re seemingly unable to break through their pain and truly live again.

There are no neat and tidy solutions that fit every injured spirit, but there is one thing we all must do if we want a better life. If you can allow yourself to do this, you will free yourself to begin living anew. You will create a path to personal growth, better habits and greater fulfillment. What is this healing thing? Forgive yourself.

A dad just left my office who shared that he used cocaine for eleven years before he stopped using drugs. However, decades later his adult sons continue to blame dad for their problems today. This dad gets lonely without his family and wishes that his sons would visit or call him more often. Regretfully, while he has stopped using, his sons are all using drugs today.

A message about forgiving yourself can be the solution for not walking around in shame. Whether you are a person of faith or not, this message of forgiving yourself is important. 

Perhaps you are an alcoholic or drug user who has hurt many people in your life. Maybe you chose not to have the baby and are conflicted with the decision. Perhaps you weren’t really there for your children. Whatever it is, forgive yourself. You are not perfect, none of us are. The sins of our past don’t define who we choose to be today and who we will be in the future. Acknowledge that you stumbled. You blew it. You hurt people. Scars and bad blood and a lot of carnage may have been left in your wake. You may have to pay some dues, make things as right as you can, apologize to those hurt. Some will never forgive you. But in the end, you have to forgive yourself. You have to unshackle that burden. Allow for the statute of limitations on past transgressions to end. I know, you don’t think you deserve it. You don’t think you can. But you’re wrong. It really is possible to forgive yourself. And then move on. Why? Because a better life requires this.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are still shackled with guilt about their poor judgment in the past. Our Lord comes to those who have the faith to realize that we are not perfect but can count on God’s mercy. Bring comfort to those hearts that have been hurt by our selfish attitudes and behaviors and give healing to those who have stumbled and can count on your forgiveness. Help us all to receive the grace to forgive ourselves and move on. 

Are You Walking on Water or Sinking Like a Stone

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Let’s be honest with ourselves when we are talking about our faith. Some days you walk on water and other days you sink like a stone.  Faith invariably gives way to doubt before it again recovers its confidence, then it loses it again.

Remember the story of Peter walking on water. The story goes this way: The disciples had just witnessed a major miracle, Jesus fed more than 5000 people with five loaves of bread and two fishes. Having just witnessed a miracle, their faith was strong. Soon afterwards they get into a boat to cross a lake. Jesus is not with them. A few miles out they run into a fierce storm and begin to panic. Jesus comes walking towards them on the water. Initially they’re frightened and take him for a ghost. But he calms their fear by telling them, right from the center of the storm, that he is not just Jesus but that he is God’s very presence.

Peter is immediately buoyed up in his faith and asks Jesus to let him too walk on the water. Jesus invites him to do so and Peter gets out of the boat confidently and begins to walk on the water. But then, realizing what he was doing and the incredulous nature of it, he immediately starts to sink, cries out for help, and Jesus has to reach out and rescue him from drowning.

What we see illustrated here are two things that lie at the heart of our experience of faith, namely, that faith (literally) has its ups and downs and that it works best when we don’t confuse it with our own efforts.

Faith has its ups and downs. Our own faith works exactly like that, at times it lets us walk on water and at other times we sink like a stone. The gospel-image of Peter walking on the sea speaks for itself.

We easily get discouraged because our faith vacillates in this way. My spiritual mentor was being wheeled into surgery and he was worried, but he folded his hands and prayed: “Lord, Your will be done,” and immediately he felt a sense of peace. Faith works like that: We can walk on water only as long as we don’t think that we are doing it with our own strength.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who feel like that they are sinking like a stone. Remind them that the Spirit comes into our life with a deep secret that sometimes we know, and then not, and then we know it again.  Faith works like that, some days we walk on water, other days we sink like a stone, and then later we walk on water. 

A Glimpse of Christ

I shared the story about the Transfiguration when we encounter Jesus, who reveals a glimpse of his divinity to Peter, James and John to prepare them for the cross, which would precede his resurrection.

I believe if we are paying attention, there are many times in our life when we come to glimpse a scene of perfect beauty. Whether a sunset, a beautiful round barn, a work of art, a beautiful piece of music, a sermon made by your shepherd, or the goodness and sincerity of people, that glimpse sustains us over a long time.

In our community, Tim has been working hard for over a year and a half to get folks in the county to support the Charlotte Comfort Home. However, it can be difficult to get folks from many different regions to work together for a common cause. A tad discouraged that his committee had yet to generate time and energy and funding, he felt discouraged and ready to call it quits.

This is where he was given a glimpse of the Risen Christ who appeared not in a dazzling display of light like fireworks. Rather, it came from a person who listened and reassured this humble leader that he would join his committee and work on raising the funds to restore the parish building that would offer comfort to the dying and care for family members.

You see, this Transfiguration moment is about letting our light shine before others. That is exactly what Tim found in the voice of his friend. We let the light shine when we live our lives as “other Christs.” 

To be “other Christs,” we need to reflect Christ to others by loving God, neighbor, and self – to follow the heart of our faith, the triple-love message  of Jesus Christ.  We do this when we forgive our enemies, give drink to the thirsty, feed the hungry, console the sorrowful, instruct those searching for a purpose, care for the dying, visit those in our hospitals, nursing homes and prisons.

It’s four o'clock on a Sunday afternoon and I just returned from church. No, I did not preach a four-hour homily. Rather, I visited the sick in two hospitals in Buffalo, extended our blessings to Bishop Peplowski at Brothers of Mercy and visited a dear friend who has multiple sclerosis and wanted to let me know that it’s time to have a little fun and set a date for dinner.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who radiate your light to those in need. Give us the grace to do better and let our shine before all in need of our helping hands.

Parable of the "Smarties"

On a recent Road Scholar trip to Acadia National Park, my friend provided treats to all the hikers during their lunch break. While people were hydrating with water and eating their sandwiches after a two-hour hike, he reached into his backpack and gave them each a treat. People were surprised and appreciated his kind gesture.

This is what the parable of the mustard seed is all about. It’s about those small acts of kindness, whatever it was, that stay in our memory. Small acts, of cruelty of kindness, leave their effect long after the effects of events of seemingly much greater importance have passed away.

 

There is, I believe, a profound lesson in this. The Kingdom of God, as Jesus assures us, is about mustard seeds, about small seemingly unimportant things, but which, in the long run, are the big things.

I have always found it ironic that we easily forget the big things, the events that seem of great importance. Who won the Nobel prize for literature two years ago? Who won the academy awards last year? Who won the Super Bowl three years ago, the World Series last year, the Stanley Cup this year? It’s funny how quickly we tend to forget these things. It is also curious what we do not forget.

We tend to forget quickly who won such or such an award, or who starred in such and such a movie or play. But we remember, and remember vividly, with all the healing and grace it brought, who was nice to us all those years ago on the playground at school or who gave us “Smarties” on top of Cadillac Mountain after a challenging three hour hike.

Falls come, winters come, springs come, summers come and go, and sometimes the only thing we can remember from a given year is some small mustard seed, of cruelty or kindness. Taking the time to cross the Canadian border to buy “Smarties” for your hiking partners was a wonderful act of kindness that will never be forgotten. So when you wake up tomorrow morning, it’s your choice what mustard seeds you want to plant.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends and thank them for all the small acts of kindness that they have given to their family and friends. I believe that God does cares a great deal about the small things we do for one another.