On Holy Saturday, I asked the congregation to watch me as I walked over to side altar where Fr Erick had brought out a statute that depicted Jesus lying in the tomb. Behind this scene, I had designed and draped red fabric to depict the red rock formations outside of Vegas and directly behind the still body a black cloth to simulate the darkness inside the tomb.
I pointed to this scene and whispered: “How could God let this happen?”
The tomb is full. The stone is rolled across the opening. There is no going back. The disciples are overwhelmed with fear, shock, exhaustion, and grief. The air has been sucked out of our lives. This is what Holy Saturday is about.
This is where many of us spend far too much of our time. Rather than just a day, the experience of Holy Saturday can last seasons or years. It is the dark night of the soul. It is those times where doubt and despair have taken hold of our lives, and we cannot find the love of God anywhere.
“How could God let this happen?” are the only prayers we can muster. These are the times when sickness occupies our lives, or we are exhausted caring for a dying loved one, or we feel the loneliness after our spouse has died. For some it could the fear that our funds will run out to buy food or medicine for our kids or worse that we might be unjustly deported, It is our agony in the garden before the prospect of having to live even another day in the darkness.
Do we have the faith to stay with this suffering? To sit in the dark night and still believe our cries are being heard? St. Ignatius implores that when prayer is dry and empty, we must double down and sit in the dryness even longer. This is our faith and practice: believing that somehow God is using even this most horrendous darkness of our lives to give birth to new life in ourselves and our world.
The Holy Saturdays of our lives come far more often than once a year and last far longer than a day. When we are utterly at a loss with the state of our Church, our political systems, our families and communities, and our lives, we are called to stay firm and to name and sit in that darkness and suffering. We cannot abandon our faith in Infinite Love.
Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that you give them the grace of strength and courage in their moments of darkness. There is no doubt in my mind that Easter will follow to crush the darkness. Never doubt that God is listening and will answer your cry for help.
