Clothes Shopping with Your Spouse

The last time my spouse went shopping for clothes was in Walmart a few years ago to pick out something to wear while gardening. She said, you got to be in the right mood before you start looking for jeans, khakis, intimates, or blouses.

When you took your vows and said “for better or for worse” most men would agree that shopping with their partner is “the worse.” Actually. my partner would agree when after two hours walking between Penny’s and Macy’s she stated that she would “rather clean kitty litters all day” then shop for clothes.

I never mind tagging behind her in the store while she browses and engages her basic hunter gatherer instinct. However, my memories take me back when my dear mom, now shopping in heaven, would ask me to take her to Montgomery Ward or “Wards” to help her buy clothes. That was her favorite store because it had the best selection in her sizes. Actually, she wanted my opinion about color and fit. So once again, while I am standing around the women’s section waiting for my soul mate, I get a text to wait outside the fitting room near the swim suits. What’s up? She wants my opinion about color, style and fit. I am now enlisted as the personal clothing consultant. I wonder if Jesus ever took his Mother Mary to the local clothing shop and helped her pick out her wardrobe.

Despite exhaustion and perspiration, my partner found a few items that fit and met her specs. Better yet, after a quick lunch and back in another store she spotted a blouse and asked me “what do you think?’ With a smile, I offered my feedback that it was not too snug and the style would go with a casual look to enjoy at an evening outdoor concert.

On this shopping expedition, I received a “Godwink” from a kind customer service rep. I told my spouse to continue her hunter gatherer adventure while I paid for her selections. While cashing out, the kind lady clerk said “you are very thoughtful helping to find her clothes.” I told this kind lady that it was fun for me while knowing that for my partner it was sheer torture.

For some people, shopping does not get high marks for fun thing to do on a Saturday afternoon. Shopping can be looked upon as a boring chore that a few men endure, the other 80% just won’t come along for the ride. Or, you can interpret this time together as a lesson in patience and generosity. I might add gratitude to spend some quality time with your spouse to help her feel comfortable and look her best. 

I like this take-home thought. When something hasn’t turned out well, don’t give up; keep going, and try different ways of making it work. There is no fixed answer, no single solution. We find the best approach through trial and error.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who are facing some difficulties that they prefer to avoid. Shopping is not the worse task in the world, but it goes a lot easier with someone holding your clothes, giving you a thumbs up and using their credit card to purchase all your stuff. Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.

Something Special for Dad

Some things you never heard come out of your father’s mouth:
Number 3 “Well, how ’bout that! … I’m lost! … Looks like we’ll have to stop and ask for directions.”
Number 2 “Here’s a credit card and the keys to my new car –… GO CRAZY!”
And the Number 1 thing you never heard your father say: “Would you mind turning that music up a bit!”

Father’s Day can bring up memories & feelings for all of us –some not so good, others bring a smile. My experience of what a father is – was very good. He was a member of the American Legion and liked to volunteer at the Veterans Hospital. He also was my Little League coach who realized that while I was a good first baseman I couldn’t hit a ball for beans.

Every year, I search for a gift to quench the thirst of the nurturing dads in my parish. This year my search took me to Tennessee where I thought I could purchase some old fashion “Dad’s Root Beer.” However, my order came too late, so I had to improvise and sure enough came up with Plan B. With the help of a local beverage distributor, we found another brand founded in 1889 called “Saranac Old Fashion Root Beer.” We invited all our nurturing men to stand in their sits as their loved ones placed their hands on them and I offered this Father’s Day Blessing Prayer based on Scripture.

MY CHILD . . .
You may not know me, but I know everything about you. Psalm 139:1
I know when you sit down and when you rise up. Psalm 139:2
I am familiar with all your ways. Psalm 139:3
Even the very hairs on your head I’ve numbered. Matthew 10:29-31
For you were made in my own image. Genesis 1:27
In me you live and move and have your being. Acts 17:28
You are my child. Acts 17:28
I knew you even before you were conceived. Jeremiah 1:4-5
I chose you when I planned creation. Ephesians 1:11-12
You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book. Psalm 139:15-16
I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live. Acts 17:26
I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you. Psalm 34:18
As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart. Isaiah 40:11
One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes. Revelation 21:3-4
And I’ll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth. Revelation 21:3-4
I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son Jesus. John 17:23
Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen. Luke 15:7
I have always been Father, and will always be Father. Ephesians 3:14-15
My question is…Will you be my child? John 1:12-13
I am waiting for you. Luke 15:11-32
Come home. Luke 15: 7
Signed: With Love Everlasting – Your Divine Dad, Amen

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends, and thank you for the gift of the father of our family. We honor all nurturing men who serve as coaches, teachers, mentors, advisors and thank You for the good things that are ours because of him. His love and concern for us has been a sign of Your divine affection and a sharing in your holy love. May we who have the honor of bearing his family name do so with great pride. May, we, the members of his family, assist him in his holy duties as a parent. With our respect, our obedience and our deep affection bless him, Lord with happiness and good health, with peace and with good fortune,

Fireworks for Holy Communion

Sitting at the end of the pew are six little people who in a few moments will be receiving their First Holy Communion. Beside them are their proud parents and family. So, I pull up my “preaching stool” and tell them a story.

Once upon a time, my dad announced that we were going to see fireworks. We would pack our blankets and cooler with food and head for the beach. On our way, I noticed that there was a man with a cart who was selling creamsicles. I love creamsicles, especially the orange ones,
I ask my dad if I could have a creamsicle. He said we’ve got plenty of food in the cooler. So, what could I do?  We unrolled our blanket, took out our food and began to eat. As we were eating, I saw that my friend Sammy was sitting with his family a little up the beach. Dad, can I please go and watch the fireworks with Sammy and his family? I worn him down until so he said, go and as soon as the fireworks are done, you come right back here. Understood? Promise? Yes, I promised.

So, I started going but I had an idea! Instead of going straight to Sammy’s family, what if I just went a little bit out of my way to that creamsicle man? Of course, doing that would be disobeying my dad, but I really wanted to taste a creamsicle. I made sure I knew where we were sitting, next to a life guard station with a big red sign on it. So, I started down the beach looking for the creamlike man. However, when I came to the place where I had last seen him, he was not there. He must have moved, so I went a bit further, and then a little bit further and then the fireworks started. Then I realized I better get back to my family.

So, I looked for the lifeguard station but when I got there, it wasn’t the right life guard station. It didn’t have a red sign on it. It was then that I realized that I was lost. I began to wonder whether I would ever find my family again? Would they leave and go back home without me? What could I do? I decided to pray.
“Jesus, I know it wasn’t the smartest idea to go after that creamsicle, but I really need your help. I can’t find my family and if you could lead me back, I promise I will never disobey my mother or father again. I will never tell a lie again. Amen.”

I was desperate and began to cry. After a few moments I looked up to see a police officer. I told him that I was lost and couldn’t find my family. The policeman asked, Do you have any idea where they are?  I said, they’re next to a big lifeguard station with a red sign on it. He said, I know right where that is.

We walked together for a very long time and I saw my family sitting on our blanket and watching the fireworks. They were just coming to an end. I thanked the policeman and ran towards my family. My dad saw me coming. Matty, you’re back right on time just as you promised. Good work. How was Sammy? Then I realized that my dad didn’t even know anything had happened. He thought I was with Sammy’s family the whole time. This was good, I thought. All I would have to do was say, “oh, they’re fine” and I could get out of this mess. But then I remembered the prayer that I made and the promise to tell the truth. Dad, I didn’t go to see Sammy. I went to buy a creamsicle and I got lost and a policeman found me.

Matty, I’m very disappointed in you. Then there was a pause and then dad said, But, you told me the truth, even though you could have gotten away with a lie, right?

Well, that makes me proud and don’t ever do that again. So, we packed up our stuff and just as we were leaving the beach, who did we run into but the creamsicle man! My dad stopped and looked at me, Hey, Matty, how about a creamsicle?

Jesus disciples learned the same thing that I learned when I was at the fireworks—that even when you’re lost, even when you make bad decisions, Jesus still loves you and comes to find you. This is what I told our little folks making their First Communion. You belong to Jesus. He loves you deeply. You are invited to come to His table and share in His very life. Never forget His love for you.

Then I looked at all the grownups in church and said. No matter how lost you feel, no matter how many bad decisions you may have made, you too belong to the family of God. Jesus will reach out with His hand to save you from the messes of your life.

When you come up with your child and put your hand on their shoulder as they receive Holy Communion for the first time, remember that Jesus is with you at your side and He will never stop loving your family.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends, bless our children and their parents with your spirit that brings happiness, understanding and joy.

Come on Jesus, Light Our Fire!

On Sunday, Holy Family Parish celebrated a “birthday bash.” It was the 8^th Anniversary of the rebirth of this Catholic community and as an added incentive the parishioners “burned their mortgage.”

I didn’t want anyone to miss this celebration of our rebirth. I wanted it to be like a” birthday bash” to celebrate their love for one another. Make no mistake, it is their faith, their sacrifices and stubbornness who literally bought their church for $110,000 from the Buffalo Diocese and made it financially self-sufficient. It has become a living presence of Jesus love for everyone not only in North Java but in all our neighboring towns.

On Sunday, I shared that this time of year farming takes precedent to till the soil, fertilize and plant the seed that has been delayed by our soggy Spring. However, this “shepherd’ decided to call each of your homes to invite you to this celebration. I realized that you get spam calls on your cell phones and I worried that if the priest is calling your home it must mean trouble or worse a tragedy. Think about it.  When was the last time your pastor called you on the phone to invite you to have some fun?

So, I made over a 100 phone calls and after two hours either left messages or talked to some nice parishioners inviting them to our birthday bash. The most interesting response was a voicemail that had the Notre Dame Fight song on their phone to take a message. Then there was a person who answered while in their locker getting ready to start their shift work. Another response: “What can I bring to the party, do you want cookies or mimosas?” Someone shared that they were so happy that a family member started coming to church with them and that brought them much joy and comfort. Yes, a few calls were dropped, or went to a fax machine instead of the phone. And then there was this sarcastic voicemail: “You know what to do. Go ahead and when I get time I will call you back.”
I always tell people that the real celebration takes place after the last blessing at Mass. No one leaves this church early because the celebration continues with our social gathering after Mass. While all the other Catholics are running over one another in their parking lots, at Holy Family people stay to chat and share their stories about what’s happening on their farms. This is a sacramental moment in which we are transformed into a community that really cares about one another. People want to know how they can help each other in life. We are a community brought together by food, at the altar in the bread and wine and at the table in the back of church with our kirsch, cookies, brownies and breakfast pizzas.

This is what I know a pastor is supposed to do - show his people how good God is in his creation: "Look and see, taste and see, touch and smell and hear and see that God is good." That is my role as shepherd of this wonderful, generous community to help you taste and see the goodness of the Lord.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends that includes all these amazing people at Holy Family. They have discovered the secret of your teaching. Love. "Where charity and love prevail, there God is always found. Brought here together by Christ's love, by love are we thus bound.” Next week, six of our children will be making their First Holy Communion. Why not come and experience another sacred moment? We would love to have you join our family.