Monday, May 21, 2007

Charity

I read a story about another scandal. It pointed a finger at a friend whom I highly respect. Scandal comes in all shapes and sizes. The consequences for the accused are either prison or bankruptcy. I would prefer to think that the system leads to justice and mercy.

What I admire about this Sonshine friend is their genuine love and respect for all creatures great and small. This kind soul cared for a beautiful German shepherd names Jessie. The dog was a gentle soul like the companion. However, this faithful companion suffered a miserable disease that made the animal incontinent. Embarrassing for any adult who has to cope with this inconvenience, our gentle soul would clean up the messes and never once complained. Sure the disease was a bother, but how often do you perform tasks that no one would touch—“scrubbing the bathroom bowl comes to mind” and never complain.

Our ability to love others beyond the call of duty is tested daily. Taking care of a loved one with dementia, living with a partner who suffers depression, or cleaning up the messes of your sick puppy are not easy chores. Jessie had found a home in which the master looked beyond the inconvenience and loved this animal despite the clutter of “duty.”

We learn in life to step over the messes and look away from the quirks or crazy relatives that you cannot fix. I believe many people dump their mates prematurely thinking that the next relationship will be easier.

Giving up the idea of perfection from your companion and settling for “good enough” is not caving in. It gives you the time to experience the unselfish love that the Lord taught and lived in his daily life. The essence of authentic happiness comes from a willingness to care for the innocence, the unborn, the frail and fragile. When we give strength and hope to others we truly walk in the spirit of God’s love. Cleaning up the messes of your beloved pet, best friend and companion are a way of waling in the light and truth of God’s love. We focus our energy on the more important tasks to cuddle and reassure our best friend that they are not alone in their suffering.

Scandal could turn this compassionate soul to prison despite their plea of innocence. So I called this gentle soul who did not answer their phone and left this message: “ You are and always will be a trusted friend.”

Pray and reflect: “Do not withhold your mercy from me, O LORD; may your love and your truth always protect me.” Psalm 40:11.

Lord, I pray for all my Sunshine Friends who publicly have been shamed.
Give them strength and courage. It is mercy we desire when we have made our own messes in life. We pray for the victims who have no voice and help them to heal of their wounds.

Friday, May 18, 2007

Black Hole

He only wanted some company so this separated husband called his wife to ask her out not for a date but just to have coffee and a bite to eat. Her answer was “why didn’t you call me earlier in the day, I’m just getting settled to watch some DVD’s?” Angry and disappointed, this lonely husband turns to his other mistress of the past his gambling and drinking addiction and goes on a binge. He says this relationship with gambling never made him happy. Odd thing to say when most treatment says people turn to their addictions of choice to find relief. Instead, this man’s admits that his addiction only him feel worse.

Sometimes, our anger demands that we can’t accept differences from other people. His wife didn’t say I never want to see you again. In fact. the couple was making genuine progress in healing their broken marriage. She only wanted him to accept that for one evening she wanted to chill and do her own thing. Instead anger says, I want…I want…I want… always my way or the highway.

After 45 days of sobriety our lonely man was challenged to resume his sobriety path. He could go back to a meeting or call his sponsor or now he sat in from of me to confess this relapse and it was time to heal.

Lord, there are many dumb decisions we make in a lifetime. However, let us never run away from you when you are calling into our souls to drive out the selfishness and pain and offer your healing and comfort.

Our man promised he would go to gamblers anonymous that night. It was not his first thought after our meeting, but the mistress made another false promise. Just use me whenever you are lonely or afraid and I will bring you relief. She lied again, but he felt only worse, but couldn’t help himself but placed another bet, take another chance or take another sip.

It is only when we surrender of powerlessness that we understand healing begins. So if its mercy you seek when you fail to accept the differences of loved ones and want to run away with your drug to hide and bathe in your self pity. Come back to the Lord and let his power embrace you with his sweet mercy and make you feel whole again.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine friends who are consumed with their addictions. It might the porn on the internet, or your nicotine or marijuana, or whatever chemical you ingest to forget the black hole you feel you are in. Pray to God to come out of your tomb into his light and experience his peace and calming balm.

Planting Roses

You would think asking your husband to plant a few lovely rose bushes wouldn’t be such a big deal. But it led to one of the worse arguments this couple of 40 years ever had in their history. Such a small request that leads to such a big blow up. Why is this happening Lord?

My poor lady suffers from diabetes and poor vision. She was already losing her sight before this miserable disease and no one not even her husband understands what’s it like to slowly lose your sight. Worse, she had another serious episode when something happened inside her eyes and it was diagnosed as fluid detaching from her retina. Everything looks like “fish scales” and this would make anyone of else anxious and edgy.

Her request to ask her husband to do some gardening was met with the usual promise that he would get to it. But when our depressed, blurred vision lady asked her husband to dig the hole for the bushes, he had more excuses and more important things to attend do. This is when she “lost it.” She felt abandoned, unimportant and alone. When his spouse returned from his chores, he said he was ready to dig the hole and wanted to know how big it should be. She replied, “make the hole as big as you and put yourself it.” Opps!

Lord, our anger gets the best of us whenever we feel that no one understands our pain, our disease, our lonely thoughts. There are many times we are blinded by our own selfishness to get things done our way.

Lead us all away from the blindness that makes love become cold. Help us to see more clearly that requests from a loved one are not about dominance but a genuine need for help and reassurance.

Sometimes we just don’t see as clearly as we think we had hoped. Maybe some drops of kindness and charity would help clear our vision to see that our loved one need us to respond with generosity and kindness.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine friends who suffer from blindness, cancer, multiple sclerosis, fibromylgia, chronic back pain and all the miseries that make us feel we are in a dark hole and want to scream. Lord, heal and strengthen us in those moments. Come, Spirit rekindle in our hearts the desire to know that you want us to be healed of all our misery and pain.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Walking with the Lord

One time there were two warring tribes in the Andes, one that lived in the lowland and the other high in the mountains. The mountain people invaded the lowlanders one day, and as part of their plundering of the people, they kidnapped a baby of one of the lowlander’s families and took the infant with them back up into the mountains. The lowlanders didn’t know how to climb the mountains. They didn’t know any of the trails that the mountain people used, and they didn’t know where to find the mountain people or how to track them in the steep terrain. Even so, they sent out their best party of fighting men to climb the mountain and bring the baby home.

The men tried first one method of climbing and then another. They tried one trail and then another. After several days of effort, however, they had climbed only a couple of hundred feet. Feeling hopeless and helpless, the lowlander men decided that the cause was lost, and they prepared to return to their village below. As they were packing their gear for the descent, they saw the baby’s mother walking toward them. They realized that she was coming down the mountain that they hadn’t been able to climb. And, they saw that she had the baby strapped to her back. How could this be?

One man greeted her and said, “We couldn’t climb this mountain. How did you do this when we, the strongest and most able men in the village, couldn’t do it?” She shrugged her shoulders and said, “It wasn’t your baby.”

What saved the baby was a mother’s love. What enables us to walk a difficult path is Jesus’ love. When something is important to us we are willing and able to make the walk. Do you want to be made well? Do you want to pursue a life-long dream? Do you want to make an improvement in your life? Do you want your faith to be stronger? Rise, take up your mat and walk!

The 200 plus mothers you asked me to pray for on this Sunday are simply amazing. Whether in heaven or on earth, they made the walk because no one could do it for them. They are our models of walking with the Lord.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends and their mothers and thank you for the love of mothers who believe in us and encourage us to make the walk.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Walk

Last night I visited a retired Sonshine friend who struggles with her multiple sclerosis for the past 20 years. Her doctors would like her to quit smoking. I told her that when she was ready she would quit. However, she said that prescription was not working and she needed a stronger dose—meaning stronger words to make her want to quit! So, I told her “it’s time to quit!” Friday would be the anniversary of her father’s birthday who died of emphysema. It would be her quit day.

I thought that she might refuse. But, she didn’t hesitate. Perhaps she was in so much emotional pain that she was ready to do anything. On the other hand, this friend is a person with a deep faith and she trusted her doctor whom she refers to as Dr. Prozac. Fortunately she accepted the challenge and she is ready to quit smoking.

Jesus challenged the man at Bethzatha to “stand up, take his mat and walk.” “At once the man was made well, and he took up his mat and began to walk.” Unlike my procrastinating friend who waited several years to quit, this man waited thirty-eight years before he could walk. During that time he was just a few yards away from the healing waters of the pool by the Sheep Gate. However, he never made it to the pool.

Since Jesus asked the question, “Do you want to be made well?” the implication is that the man may have been apprehensive. He seemed also to make excuses. “No one would help me,” he said, and “Someone always steps in front of me.” The man was playing the role of victim.

The man beside the pool at Bethzatha was not willing to try. He lay helplessly near the pool that could give him new life. If he reached the swirling waters of the pool he would have the potential to be made well. So why didn’t he try? If he did it meant he would have to change. He could no longer wallow in self pity, having others feeling sorry for him. He was stuck, miserably stuck. No wonder Jesus asked if he wanted to be healed.

Why is it that we fail to try something that can help us? Why is it so hard to quit smoking or change our diets? Why do we refrain from exercise when we know it will make us feel better? Why do we ignore opportunities for travel and relaxation when we know it will refresh us? Why do so many people skip worship when they have found nourishment for the soul in the past?

Perhaps it is the fear of change. Perhaps it is just plain stubbornness. The man in the gospel story saw only obstacles. He was defeated before he even tried. It was not until Jesus confronted him with the question, "Do you want to be healed?" that the man finally gave in.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends and believe that Jesus wants the best for all of us. Sometimes we have to be confronted or challenged in order to be made well. Notice that Jesus didn’t touch the man or lay hands on him. He didn’t say he needed faith to be made well. There was no prayer, no magic. He simply told him to “walk.” My friends, “it’s time to walk…”

Monday, May 07, 2007

Maybe We Need Some Washing

Now I understand a tiny bit better what it means to be a mom. Its 11 pm on a Sunday night and the kettle is simmering with the beans and onions for tonight’s Soup Supper. Tired and exhausted from managing the household, holding down the fort for the daily crises, I don’t know how mothers do it.

On Sunday, I shared the story about a college freshman who struggled with her alcohol addiction. She called on Saturday morning to inform me that she was in trouble with the police. There was this party on Friday night and you get the idea. I asked: "Did you call you mother?" She said she did and I knew that she would be in good hands. I remembered the old Sonshine story about the grandma who was losing her sight. Her grandkids felt sorry for her , but her youngest granddaughter said these profound words: "If God can get grandma through this, He can get us through anything!"

Now some people would laugh and scold this little girl for being silly. Some would just ignore what the she said. But I believe this was a moment of affirmation in a young child's life. A time when innocent trust can be nurtured so that it will bloom into faith.

Honey, her mother said, you are absolutely right. Let's run through the rain. If God let's us get wet, well maybe we just needed washing. Then off mother and daughter ran. The people who witnessed this grace-filled moment stood watching, smiling and laughing as mom and daughter darted past the cars and through the puddles. They held their shopping bags over their heads just in case. They got soaked. But they were followed by a few who screamed and laughed like children all the way to their cars. Sometimes, we need washing to allow the graces of God to heal us and make us free from our foolish ways.

I can imagine when this mom got the phone call from her daughter about the party, about her troubles with the police, her words of affirmation: were: “Are you alright?” It was time for another washing.

Lord, I pray for all my Sonshine Friends who give thanks for their mothers. No one can comfort us better in our failures. May we forever be grateful for how she mentored us and even disciplined us. Bless her, Lord, and comfort her. Strengthen her when she is down and give her hope when she is discouraged. Most of all, Lord, on this coming Mother's Day, give our mothers the the graces she most needs and desires.